What Child Support Payments Are For
Parents have a legal and moral duty to support their children financially. When parents live apart, the parent who does not have main day to day care of the child will usually need to contribute towards the costs of raising them.
These payments are known as child maintenance. They can be arranged privately between parents, or they can be calculated and collected through the Child Maintenance Service (CMS). The older Child Support Agency (CSA) no longer handles new cases.
The purpose of child maintenance is straightforward: to help cover the everyday costs of bringing up a child. This includes things like food, clothing, housing, heating and school expenses.
Answer a few questions about your situation and get a clear summary of your child maintenance rights and options.
Try our Child Support Rights Checker free, here on this site →How Payments Relate to Living Costs
The parent with main care of the child bears most of the household expenses. They pay for the roof over the child's head, the meals on the table, and the dozens of smaller costs that add up over time. Child maintenance from the other parent helps share this financial burden.
When care is split more evenly between both parents, maintenance amounts will typically be reduced to reflect this. The CMS takes shared care into account when calculating payments.
One common concern is that standard maintenance calculations do not always keep pace with the actual cost of raising children. Payments are worked out as a percentage of the paying parent's gross income, but this formula does not adjust automatically when prices rise or when children's needs grow more expensive as they get older.
For current maintenance rates and how they are calculated, check the official guidance on GOV.UK.
Your situation may be slightly different. ask a question below ↓ and our editorial team will reply with our advice.
What the Money Can Be Used For
There are no strict legal rules about how the receiving parent must spend child maintenance. The money is intended to benefit the child, but the law does not require receipts or proof of how it is used.
In practice, maintenance typically goes towards:
- Housing costs, including rent or mortgage contributions
- Food and groceries
- Clothing and shoes
- School uniforms, equipment and trips
- Heating and utility bills
- Transport costs
- Childcare fees
Some paying parents feel frustrated that they cannot control or monitor how their payments are spent. However, the system is designed on the basis that the receiving parent is best placed to decide how to meet the child's needs day to day.
When Costs Are Not Fully Covered
Standard child maintenance payments may not cover everything. Larger or less predictable expenses can fall outside what the regular payments provide for. This might include things like orthodontic treatment, private tutoring, or expensive extracurricular activities.
Parents can agree between themselves to share these additional costs. If you have a private family arrangement, you have flexibility to include whatever terms suit your circumstances. Court orders can sometimes address specific expenses, but this is less common.
If your circumstances change significantly, whether your income rises or falls, or your care arrangements shift, you can ask the CMS to review your case. Keeping arrangements up to date helps ensure payments remain fair for both parents and, most importantly, continue to meet the child's needs.
For detailed information about child maintenance calculations, variations and how to make or respond to a claim, visit the Child Maintenance Service pages on GOV.UK.
On the weekends I have them my ex partner has expected me collect them from school and return them to her when she finishes work.
I have continued to do this for 18 months but now feel it is not achievable now we live 12 miles away.
I have emphasised that this is something that should be addressed and after school club should be at her cost, not mine.
I have spoken with other parents and they feel I have gone above and beyond in trying to support my ex and have the children as much as possible.
Financially and physically it is becoming more difficult to sustain this arrangement.
Am I obligated to continue this just to facilitate childcare whilst my ex partner can work without the financial cost ?
Despite my disclosure to the CMS, it has not made any difference to my payment I make.
I have my son 3 nights a week minimum including weekdays which in turn means I often have to pay for school clubs to bend around my work costing upto £20 a week at times. I have done this for some time but now finding it difficult to, even more so that my ex partner does not have this same issue and is able to work full time due to the time he spends with me. Is this something that should be taken into Consideration when discussing an amount I should be paying?
Its not clear what maintenance is meant cover!! Website says living expenses eg clothes. What does that mean? There are basic things like nursery fees. Does the paying parent by the CS amount plus nursery on top or not? Does it mean if they get visits the child should come with clothes? Does maintenance cover all that or not.
I think it should be clear given maintenance takes account of the paying parent it should be clear what it covers.
Eg a parent can decide to take tge child to the most expensive nursery they can find, is the paying parent then obliged to pay that on top of the cs amount??
TY
I asked him if he’d pay for it half towards the 2 kiddies school shoes giving that I just forked out on uniforms. He point blankly refused throwing up that I did well out of him through sale of marital home which according to him he paid for, I did have a career before having children then had to go part time to look after them, whilst he excelled in his career path, he didn’t want me working as he wanted me to care for our children.
That’s what CM is for, I’m not paying anymore, then threatened it’s going down soon?!!
But he stays free at my parents, eats drinks what he likes. I can’t see my parents whilst he’s there, my dad has cancer again & I usually help when I can but I do feel pushed out. He never bothered with them before to the point he wouldn’t visit them with me before as he hated it!!!
Any thoughts
This I feel most threatening and I will not give her anymore money on top of what I pay it's her choice to stop them going on holiday
What's anyone's advice ?
I pay my ex wife child maintenance for 2-3 days a week. But have her 3 days a week but pay the larger amount. I have now been asked for extra funds for private tuition.
Am I liable for this?
I have recently split with my fiancé, we have a 1 year old baby together and he has a 7 year old to another woman.
My ex works Monday - Friday long hours so can’t have our son during the week, however he has said he will have our son every other weekend - Friday and Saturday night.
I have calculated the maintenance payments and it is telling me that the amount he should pay is £65 per week to me and £65 per week to his ex wife. However, I have to find the nursery fees which are £138 per week and I also have our son For the majority of the time.
Can anyone explain to me if this is fair? My ex earns a great deal more than me and I am having to fund towards my sons nursery fees - food - clothing - shelter etc??
Thanks
I currently pay £160 per month child support for my 5 year old son. I go onto the gov website every April to recalculate what my payments should be to keep it fair. This has never been an issue about the amount I pay. On average my son spends 3 nights a week at my house. His mum usually sends him a weekend bag of clothes and is pretty strict in asking for stuff sending back and moans that I don’t have much clothes for my son to keep at my house. While I agree it would be easier for him to have some clothes at mine I don’t full agree that I should be the one paying out for the clothes. I always thought that my maintenance payment was for clothes ? Is there anyone who can give me advice on this please.
Thanks
He pays £180 per month as he says that this is all he should pay under the CSA. He has left my daughter with a mortgage, household bills, toddler and dog and moved in with someone else. My daughter works full time and has just changed her job as he would not come and pick the baby up for her to get to work in time. Childcare costs are £700 per month so my daughter is left trying to find £520 for childcare plus money for food, clothing and a roof over the baby’s head. Is it that he only pays this amount?
He buys there clothes and shoes etc. .
She is now asking for money for childcare costs whilst she works in the evening .
She is extravagant and spends money on false eye lashes & hair and alcohol .
Just recently we have found that she has been lying to him about house hold bills whilst they were together, she had control of his wages and was buying beauty products and saying that the bills were far higher than they were
I pay 450 a month I have one child my ex works as well. I pay a mortgage and bills. I have my child 2 days one week and 4 the week after and some half terms. I spend money on him while his with me and take him on holidays. I would like to have him more but the ex said no.
He expects me to pay for everything with this money, but I need advice as to whether this should be used for passports and stuff the children need to go on holiday with him, if its his choice to take them why should it come out of the maintenance payments I use for normal clothing and bills for their living costs. I offered to pay half but that's not good enough, sharing costs benefits us both
what can i do to stop this irrational behaviour.. i have never missed payments, never been late to pickups, never missed any event, yet the system seems to allow mothers to lie and manipulate as much as they want without issue.
I split with my ex 12 months again. He'd demanded contact Thurs-Sun and I'd agreed simply due to a lot of emotional blackmail (a bit too late I've grown wise to the fact he'd demanded this as he'd done his research and had stated these as his formal days so support payments would be minimal)
This contact is sporadic--changes his mind when it suits. A lot of arguments over him expecting me to use up my annual leave for him to have a 'life' (holidays, nights out, a week off after a vasectomy--done the rest of womankind a favour there) he doesn't pay a single penny towards childcare, and refuses to pay any maintenance (I am getting to a point where I am going to seek legal action) I only work part time so I can have a relationship with my son who is still only very little, and also to try and keep childcare costs down. My ex Meanwhilst states he pays 200 pounds travel expenses a month (I don't drive) the travel time is shared between he and his parents as are travel costs (although he has gaslit me on this one and denied he ever told me this)
Just wondering where I stand towards him also contributing towards childcare costs, he's also claimed to me that they would take into account his petrol costs when agreeing maintenance payments but not our sons childcare costs, is this correct or am I being mis informed?
Thanks
Hope you can help me with a dilemma. My partner and I have recently split up and our daughter is 4. My partner has custody (non court enforced) of our daughter and our break up is relatively amicable (considering!!).
I have started to pay maintenance to her as per GUV.UK rates and always top it up when needed eg. spoiling young madam when necessary.
The thing I'm not sure about is responsibility about childcare costs?
I currently pay all of them, but am I now entitled to ask her to pay half?
I have 3 children with my ex, 2 in school and 1 about to start nursery. Up until now I have been working evenings and all weekend (when I don’t have the kids) to get my hours in at work. I have then had my youngest during the day so their mum can work.
I pay child maintenance to their mum each week (plus fuel, food etc for when I have the youngest) but I am now looking to change my job where I would get my evenings and weekends back. On top of my child maintenance payments would I be expected to pay half the childcare fees too?
Thank you in advance
20 years later he is now suing me for £100k claiming he has been paying towards a 35% charge against my home the court rejected 15 years ago.
He has just divorced wife number two and left another two kids behind to repeat history.
To fight this I can expect £20k in legal fees.
Any suggestions that are legal or any free legal services available out there?
Can i get her dad to help with the costs?
I currently pay £160 per month maintenance to my well paid nearly ex wife for our son who is 16 in February 2018. I have him 2-3 nights per week but often he stays just one, because he likes his own bed not surprisingly.
My ex wife wants me to pay £80 extra per month towards private tuition , I’ve just paid £70 for his membership to a club.
She gets £250 a month between maintenance and Child Benefit.
Shouldn’t the money she has for our son (£250 per month) be used for these costs without me having to pay extra? I’m trying to pay for alternative permanent accommodation for my son and I , maintenance I expect to pay rightly so but being asked to pay these extras as well is reducing my ability to fund a new home for my son and I.
My solicitor says all I need to pay is the maintenance, this website says maintenance covers educational costs.
I guess I’m looking for more reassurance?
Thank you for any help
I’m going through a divorce. I’m in the martial Home as I have an occupation order against my soon to be ex. I have take over the mortgage and all bills. I will have our 1 child 4 days/nights a week and my ex 3. He earns £55,000 per year gross. And I earn £13,000 per year gross. Both full time. I’m not entitled to tax credits, due to savings and my ex also has the same amount in savings. According to CSA he will pay £68 per week child support. I would like to know if it’s fair for him to also pay half for anything to do with our child’s school. Such as uniform, dinners and trips? My husband is refusing. I said he can pay directly himself. Not to me. But to the school etc. Any advice would be great
Thanks in advance
I have been paying mutually agree maintenance for my son since my ex wife and I parted ways nearly 13 years ago.
My son turned 18 in September. He attends college 3 days a week (more than 12 hours) and I pay themutually agreed maintenance to his mother as per the sum that the CMS calculator has given - comes in at £160 per month based on my monthly pension. On top of this I am paying £50 a month for his phone AND am giving him £80 a month to help fund him whilst he tries to get through college. The phone and other £80 are in addition and voluntary by me.
Being 18 years old, things are changing with him. He is wanting to take driving lessons and I have said I will pay for his car and his first years insurance. Should I deduct the costs of this from what I give his mother per month? Do car costs for the "child" get considered in all this? Being 18 he is not really a "child" per se and his priorities etc.. are different.
Also, he may be working soon. He may only do one day at college and work the remaining 4 days. So, college is less than 12 hours and he is earning a wage. From what I have read, this means that in this circumstance I should no longer pay maintenance - I will be telling him to pay his mother rent.
Being 18, he does stay with me but not as often as before and its an "open door" policy really for him because you never know what he is upto lol..
Any advice welcome and thank you.
Great site by the way. Really helpful.
thank you
p.s. my ex and i are both happy with the amounts paid just want the tax credits people of her back!
My wife (separated) is planning to go to the CMS.
We currently share care in terms of overnight stays where she has them one night per week more than me (I currently have them sleep with me an average of 3 nights and she has them 4 nights per week). One night a week however when they sleep at her house I do actually pick them up from school at 3:15pm, feed them, take them to clubs and care for them until later in the evening when I take to my wife's to sleep. With this in mind I do feel that I share care equally with my wife, I also contribute to school trips, pocket money, clubs etc etc. My wife also receives child benefit and earns over 50,000 per annum and makes lifestyle choices to live in an expensive house, drive a brand new car etc.
In terms of equal care would the CMS conclude that this was not the case on the basis the children don't sleep at my house one night a week despite the fact I provide daytime care on this day. Secondly would they conclude it was not equal care on the basis my wife receives child benefit.
Finally if I were to obtain a formal 50:50 custody split when we get divorced would this change any of the above or would the simple fact she claimed Child Benefit prevent this.
Thanks
Due to our legal system being biased her favourite child goes to private school and other child doesn’t, I was made to give her 60% of out estate and pay £450 contribution towards school fees.
Girls are now 13 and 15, their mother is always out working so less rules, they decided to live with her, CMS have confirmed on the phone I only have to now pay their calculation which is £505 a month.
Can I be made to pay school fees in addition to CMS payment?
I have my son all day on a tuesday 9:30am - 18.00pm as well as on a weekend, but on the tuesday i do not have him over night, does this count towards ony CSA payments or is it just bases on over night stays?
Thanks
I have also helped my ex partner out from time to time when she has been short of cash but now I think she is taking advantage of my goodwill. We are going through divorce proceedings and she is now threatening to take half the profit from my house sale which I’ll struggle to defend unfortunately, but am I able to withdraw all of the above and reduce my maintenance payment to that of the calculator (which is £116 less than I currently pay) to recover the money, not that the boys will ever go without I just don’t want her to profit any further from my generosity and use the kids against me.
I feel terrible even considering this avenue but I’m refusing to be walked all over by a woman who could quite easily get off her arse and earn as much as me rather than using the kids as an excuse especially when I do all the running around and have them almost an equal amount of time over a year....
Any help would be greatly appreciated
I am a non resident parent and pay my child’s mother the required amount of money as per the government website.
When our little daughter first went to the nursery she was only 1.5 and had to travel long distances by bus early in the morning (6am) so my ex could get to her new full time job in a different town. I strongly disapproved this idea, especially that we had a mutual friend living nearby my daughters house who offered to look after our child. I offered lifts etc but I was put aside. Then I was begging to be the resident parent and explained that if she agreed, I would not work full time anymore and make daycare arrangements so the child does not need to travel so much and early. After many very expensive mediations, she did not let me be the resident parent and I refused to pay for this nursery. Since then I was forbidden to pick up the child from there even when it was my day with our daughter. Instead I had to wait for her to finish her work.
When our daughter was 3, my ex quit the job and moved much further away from me. She and her husband put her to the new preschool. I offered to pay half if I could pick her up from there etc but it was refused as her partner had enough money to cover it at the time.
Now my daughter is about to go to school, so I arranged a meeting to discuss holidays and new times etc. My ex said that her partner had to take a loan of £6000 to cover the cost of the preschool and she wants me to pay half.
I don’t think it’s fair as for many years I was unable to be there for my daughter on big events, learn about her day to day activities and find out about the progress she made. I was in touch with the headmaster regardless of threats of my ex as I found it nesseseary to help my daughter with her development.
Please can you advise if I should now pay half for the daycare?
My ex partner and I use the CMS as a way for him to support our two children. He is the non resident parent, is financially secure and pays directly into my account. I am not financially secure.
Recently he has said that he wants to take away money from what has been calculated for him to pay for the support of the children and use it on flights etc to Cover returning the children to me, he never travels alone and the costs would have to cover two adults and two children.
If this happens we would not be able to afford the childrens basic needs and current living conditions. We may end up being forced out of our home, as his money for the children goes towards part rent payment, food, clothes, school meals, school uniform, school books, contact travel (to get them to him) and any extra curriculum that is part of the school (trips) along with gas and electricity.
I would like to ask if it is possible for my ex partner to take this money that is meant for the childrens living to pay for his contact with them? If so, what can i do to try to keep the childrens lives as normal as possible in the circumstances.
Thank you
My girls are at a child minder before and after school on a Wednesday and thursday, and all day during school holidays , the agreement at the beginning was fir my x to see the girls at mine every Wednesday nite ( I collected the girls from the child minder)
Since the original agreement Wednesday nites has changed to a over night stay
I take the girls Wednesday morning
He collects them Wednesday nite - both have been feed
He returns them before school Thursday
I collect them Thursday evening
I still pay for the cost of this including school holidays (including the minders holidays
Am I right to say that I shouldn’t be covering the whole cost of this
I ve said to him he should be paying Wednesday nite Thursday morning and one of the full days during school holiday
Please advise
We have calculated through cms calculator and he should be paying her £12 pw/£52 pm. She says this isnt enough and she needs the money for days out/treats etc.
We provide clothing, school uniforms (for both children even though my partner isn't financially obligated to his step-son and he still sees his real dad) and we pay half towards other things when needed like school trips.
Firstly, should my partner pay more because he still sees his step-son?
Secondly, is it right that child maintenance should go towards days out and treats?
Am I required to pay for child care for the days after I have my child or is that covered within my CMS payments, or am I required to pay for child care,
Is it acceptable for me to ask for him to pay childcare costs for the days our son is in his care as currently his maintenance wouldn’t even cover those days.
Do I still need to provide him with clothes and shoes and so on or should his mother be providing these to me?
I agreed a fee with my Ex wife which allowed things to work. However her new oartner is not happy. Could yoi advise om following plesse.
1) my wages fluctate. Therrfore how can we accruatly work out what is paid? I have my daughters 3 full days every week. However over the year i will have encorporated over 3 to 4 nights.
2) she moved further away from where she is. Thereby increasing the distance and fuel used to collect and return them
Is their a fuel element which allows for this ? How much / % is it ?
3 ) my youngest daughter has DLA of which i see none does any of that be taken fron maintainance. As she clearly requires DLA as its applied. When she is with ne she still has her additional needs
4) if i purchase clothes etc for when they at mine. Does this get taken off ( with proof of receipt? Or does EX have to provide clothes too.
5 ) school outings. Who pays fir these. And School lunches too.
6) what is Legally " Shared care" in terms of payment wise ?
Your advise would be most welcomed
Thanks
My son pays for his child who is 2 maintenance but he has to go round to the mothers home every night after work to put his son to bed and has him every weekend from Saturday through to Sunday evening. She gets 2.5 days free nursery and is now complaining that the £265 my son pays in CMS is not enough to cover the costs of having her son. She uses her CMS money to top up her rent so she can live close to her ex husband and their two children, which she moved to 6 weeks after the court ordered this arrangement. My question here is; does the mother not have an obligation to provide a roof over her sons head and what my son pays her is for food and clothing (not that she feeds him very well at all as he is usually starving when my son has him on the weekends)?
Bazz
Sorry if this has been asked before but I need some advice.
I provide £350 a month in CMS which is what the guidance says and now I am being asked to pay another £360 a month for child care.
At the moment I’m only allowed to see my daughter once a week. What am I obliged to pay? Can I stipulate what additional I pay on top of CMS?
Any advice would be welcomed
The previous two years we had a family based arrangement where I provided for my daughter whilst in my care and vise versa.
My ex recently went behind my back to csa and I have agreed to pay a percentage weekly.
I have asked my ex if she could provide a weekend bag when my daughter comes to visit as I'm now paying maintenance.
My ex is refusing and saying I should still provide whilst my daughter is here for contact as well as pay csa.
Could you please verify what should happen in this situation.
Thank you
Can you please advise the legal standpoint.
Thankyou for your time.
B
I have 2 children aged 5 & 8. My ex partner has them both every other weekend (fri-sun) and 1 night the following week,
I receive £176 p/m for maintenance which he was not happy about paying to begin with.
My daughter attends gymnastics which my ex thinks that should be left to me, aswell as things like school uniforms, Halloween costumes etc.
I understand that maintenance which I receive covers daily living etc but was not sure that it covered other necessities which I mentioned above, which he claims it does.
if you could please advise me that would be great.
thanks.
My ex signed and dated an agreement which stated that when he left this June 2017 he would pay £100.00 weekly Maintence for his son. He has been paying this amount until after Boxing Day this year. He has reduced the amount to £75.00. His job/ financial situation has not changed. What are my options? It’s a detailed agreement. Our divorce is very bitter, on his behalf. We are awaiting the decree Nisi court hearing date. He is upset about child contact with our Son, even though he has very good access. There was domestic abuse in our marriage. He is using Maintence reduction as a leverage to intimidate and cause distress.
Please advise my options? I know he will go up a pay grade next year as he works for the nhs as a mental health nurse manager. I know that he will be doing a lot of overtime to save towards a new house. I am aware of his pay grade now and his secure allowance amount he’s paid.
Thanking you for your kind help.
Elizabeth 28.12.17
Cheers
My husband has a shared residence order for his daughter and she lives with us generally speaking for 3 out of 7 nights a week. My husband pays regular maintenance to his ex and always has. We also have to buy clothes, shoes and coats for his daughter at our house, and we pay the monthly fee for her to attend brownies.
His daughter is now due to go on an overnight school trip and his ex has asked for half of the fees. We believe that the maintenance payments should pay for this trip, but would like to know if this is legally acceptable as it's not clear to us exactly what the maintenance payments should be used for.
I need some advice! My child goes to her father every other weekend and extended time in school holidays. He is taking money out of her maintenance to buy chlothes- but for when she is with him not to bring home? He moved nearly 300 miles away and we meet in the middle at his weekend, he has recently mentioned taking money from her maintenance to pay towards his travelling expenses? On a side note he is also demanding that i give him the child benefit for the time she has been in his care?
He is a lorry driver and he earned £720 for the tax YEAR ending 2015/16.
Why does the parent moth care have to prove the nrp is working cash in hand - I am hundreds of miles away from him although I have gotten most of my information from internet and HMRC and companies house - all these who's be linked and surely if someone isn't claiming benefits and can live off £720 as a long distance lorry driver there should be red flags in the air from all the above bodies surely????
My partner and his ex are now divorced. They have one child together who he has 2 nights a week and all day on the weekend. He wants more but his ex wont allow this as she admittedly said she is lonely.
He pays his payments of around 200 a month in advance. Provides clothes thats they needs. Takes them to various places on a weekend. Ie eat out at breakfast. Bowling. Swimming. Shopping.
His ex is now making him pay for after school clubs on the night he has her and the morning club the following day. This totals to £50 a month extra. The csa have told us more than once we dont need to pay these fees as they are taken into account from my partners payments. But his ex is doing everything she can to make him pay more money. Ie telling the school he needs to pay.
She has recently said he can collect her an extra day after school but has MUST take her to an activity at his expense and must be returned after.
What can we do to stop making us pay extra payments.
And the next week 3 nights / 4 days.
I pay my ex £76 a month, go half on school dinners, uniforms & clubs.it totals to about £110 a month. I feed and clothe my daughter the time I have her, i dont ask for clothes from her mother and things like toys etc are for the most part free to go between houses.
My ex is asking for an additional 68 a month to pay towards swimming lessons and horse riding lessons and making me feel guilty because I can't afford it.
What is the legal situation on this?
My husband has an 11yr old son who he pays £411 per month. We have 2 children at home age 2 and 5 and another on the way. We live approximately 516 miles away from his son, my husband travels down to see him once a month but his ex does not help ease the finacial cost of this in the slightest. He has to pick him up from his door and does not provide any clothes for him. This is putting us under financial strain because the cost to travel down and back, accommodation, car hire plus keeping up with clothes for a growing child is costing us a further £350 sometimes more per month. Its getting to the stage where my husband isn't going to be able to keep up regular contact because it is costing too much. My question is is she allowed to do this ie not send him with clothes and expect my husband to do all the running about ? Thank you
My girlfriend has a 4 year old son - we were recently taken to court by her ex, the child's father, and the court awarded that her son go to school near to her ex's house and that he stay with his dad Monday to Friday. We wanted her son to go to school near us and proposed a plan that required no child minder, just after-school clubs ad hoc.
My girlfriend's ex has now produced a bill for childminder fees due to his inability to maintain the care that was awarded to him in the Child Arrangement Order. He wants us to pay half of his fees. We consider that an unnecessary expense as we wouldn't have needed childminders if her son had been in school near us.
Have we a right to disagree with the childminder fees and refuse to pay?
He is never available to take/pick up child from school as he is at work. He has been on 6 holidays this year. He has two cars and two bikes, etc. Please help
She refuses to send uniform and I have to buy new things every 4 weeks and this keeps going on and on. What can I do about it as im not willing to send the kids to school with out uniform.
Is anyone able to help me with my comment below?
I have looked at the salary calculator and based on the frequency of nights I will have my son and it has given me a figure I should py. However my wife is saying this wont be enough to cover childcare costs? Could she ask for more than the advised amount. Will she get support from the government with childcare costs or anything else. She works part time. Approximately 24 hours per week.
Just after a bit of help, I receive child maintenance payments but today my ex partner got cross with me for not providing any spare changes of clothes for my youngest daughter and not being able to provide him with welly boots for either child.
Is it down to me to provide him with spare changes of clothes, shoes and car seats etc on days he has the kids?
My Ex says he doesn't see why he should because that's what maintenance for.
Am I within my rights to ask him to contribute or not?
Thank you in advance for your help
I'm currently in a situation where my ex can't (refuses with excuses) commute to collect or drop the children. On Arranged days I seem to be doing all of the driving.
16 small drives. One week 10 small drives one week. The weeks alternate.
So 72 small drives a month.
Am I wrong to ask for diesel contributions?
to cover all of her costs including after school clubs, lunches, mobile phones costs, school trips including aboard (including for Barcelona, Amsterdam and Skiing when these trips come up over the next year or so), etc
? Private Medical Insurance – You are responsible for ensuring that she has the same level of private medical insurance as I have covered up until now, can you please ensure this is put in place as a matter of urgency and provide me the details of the policy that you have put in place
? Lastly, you are responsible for the purchase of all School uniform and sports equipment required for the school this includes proper school shoes, proper trainers and footwear for PE. You are also responsible to provide the school clothing required for when she visits our house, our daughter's informs me that you have purchased her new uniform, however, she says that you only purchased a single option of each, however, based on the experience of this year can you please provide us with the following additional items: o Blazer with school badge o Tie o Jumper v-neck x 2 o Micro fleece o School badge o White shirts x 2 o Black trousers x 2 o School socks x 2
If you feel that you would rather not purchase these, having discussed with the CMS we can always move to a family based arrangement, whereby the items that I need to purchase are deducted from the allowance that is provided for our daughter.
Can he do that, can this be changed to a family based arrangement? do I need to agree to that?
Thank you and look forward to your reply.
I have finally plucked up the courage to obtain CSA payments for my daughter who is 9. My ex is a teacher and has rental income he has not paid anything to date. He says if I take him to the CSA he will not pay half the after school care bill that he currently does ? Can you confirm if this is correct? Thank you
My ex is not refusing to buy clothes for when my two girls stay at his house. He has bought clothes to keep at his in the past and now because they have out grown the ones he had he is saying I need to supply the clothes, he is saying that with my cms and child benefit money I can do this. My child benefit has nothing to do with him does it?
The CSA will also continue to take money off you and give it to the mother whilst you are trying to support them. and give to the mother who no longer cares for them.
If you take the CSA to ICE then the CSA will take revenge and take money from your wages and and admit they took money not due to them and laugh at you when you say you want it back and tell you that your MP will do nothing.
In my case all this is True and George Freeman my MP said there was nothing he could do. In my book taking money and admitting you were not entitled to it is theft. I will never trust a Politician or government agency. Should I report this Theft to the Police ?
My ex pays me £62/ week through CMP .
He recently asked me to renew our son's passport as he plans to take him on holiday.
I suggested that we pay half the amount each and he point blank refused and said that the CMP should ' be ample ' to cover it. Is that something I have to accept?
Thanks for your time
For info I do not get any tax credits or working tax credits or any other benefits other than child benefit.
I think he is probably right from doing a little research but can you confirm?
I receive maintenance from my kids' dad through the CMS. We have a shared residence arrangement in place regulated by the Court Order. He expects me to pay for absolutely everything, including the classes that the children attend while in his care. I am happy to pay for all the other classes; however I understand it should be his decision whether he takes the kids to the classes or not. I am no prepared to pay for classes that they may or may not attend (even though I arranged for the classes originally as per kids' wishes and there was no problem up until now). He is also expecting me to provided spare clothes, spare uniforms for his house, even though the children spend there 50% of the time.
I pay £205 month maintenance despite having my daughter 3 overnights, full day Sundays, do school drop offs/pick ups (thus no child care package). I have since stopped buying additional clothes as feel it's unfair?
Prior to the parent with care going to the csa I was also buying uniforms and clothes, as I state I have since stopped this - do to think this is right or fair given my input for my daughter.
Kind regards
Jamie
I am taking my daughter to a family wedding in a couple of months and she needs a dress. My ex refuses point blank to buy it.
I could buy it and then knock it off the child support. Am I being unreasonable ?
McKinsey
He pays £31 per week in total for our two children who live with me.
Unfortunately we are not amicable and he refuses to pay anything other than this amount, even when the kids are going on school trips which costs several hundreds of pounds etc.
He has now told me he wants to take them on holiday, but they need passports for this. He says I have to apply for these and pay for the whole cost too, as I am the parent who receives payments.
I simply can't afford it. Am I obliged to pay for the passports? We have shared custody of both children, aged 9 and 13.
My partner has 2 children (aged 6 & 8) from a previous marriage. All 3 of us are on very good wades, and my partner pays his ex £700 a month to cover costs for food ect. We have requested to have the kids 50/50, but she simply won't allow it, because of the money, but we have them 3 times a week and in that time we obviously provide the kids with a great lifestyle, including the standard; clothes, food, days out, toys, holidays ect, ect.
Myself and my partner are a little confused as to what the child maintence he pays is actually used on, as he still buys school uniform, and she takes half, and he pays half for ballet ect, as well as school food money ect ONTOP of the child maintenance, is that correct? What exactly is the £700 a month used for then?
I live with my parents at the minute but they are moving away so my costs of living are going to increase dramatically
My ex is refusing to reduce this amount
Do I have to pay her both payments
There is no court order in place
My boyfriend led me to believe that there isn't anything set in stone as to what the maintenance I receive for my child off her father covers. I have asked for more money to help with footwear and clothing for the Summer as I don't have enough to cover it all… I covered her Winter clothing, uniform & school shoes. I get half of what my daughter should be entitled to due to his extra marital affair. Is there nothing that can be done? You'd think he'd want to ensure she has what she needs!?!
My husband took a step back in his career when the children were born so that he could be around more as his ex has always been very worked focused, she prioritises it over the children. She earns far more than my husband and her and her new husband have an extremely lavish lifestyle.
We have the children half of all school holidays and for the other 39 weeks a year we have them 5 nights every other week.
Despite how often we have the children, CMS expect us to pay her over £400 a month which uncludes a small discount for my 2 children who live with us.
Obviously it is very expensive having 4 children to provide for without paying hundreds of pounds to a woman who has told us she doesn't need the money but wants to take it anyway.
Is there really nothing that can be done when child maintenance is used by the mother as a weapon?
I understand that the system is in place for those fathers that walk away from their children and don't want to pay, but what about the mothers that abuse the system?
I pay the required csa along with £450 other a £780 mortgage which my ex lives in with the girls.
I have now been told she wants me to pay childcare for the days i have them but I can't afford this. Can't I be made to do that or is it her responsibility to pay the childcare?
My ex has now said she wants me to pay towards our son's mobile phone. Whilst it's not a huge amount it's more the thought of "what next". I've said I feel this should be covered in the monthly amount I pay her, she feels differently.
There's not a lot I can find on the internet around what is covered other than some fairly bland definitions. I'd be keen to know what your thoughts are on this.
After my ex moved out my financial situation changed massively and I was struggling to survive.
Initially I had agreed to drop my child off to her fathers once a fortnight and he would bring her back.
With my new financial situation I could no longer commit to this.
After a lot of aggressive abuse the father eventually agreed to pick my child up. My financial situation has recently changed but only so We can actually afford to live in the house and eat. Now my child's father is demanding I start taking my child up to him for his visits again, he has advised he will call the Csa and deduct the travelling cost, can he do this please? As we are struggling enough and trying to get back on our feet.
He has already stopped paying towards my child's extra curricular activities so I've also had to take on that additional cost. Please can you advise if Csa will deduct travel costs? Thank you
Can a main carer use the money given for the children for repaying a mortgage? What would be the procedure to follow to request proof the money is used for the children? Solicitors?CSA or neither?
Regards
He has stated that if I pursue the child maintenance, he will not pay his half of the school fees.
He makes no other provision for my son - I buy all his clothing, food, heating costs, phone bill, school uniform etc....
Can he do this now, even though he has paid the other half of school fees for 3 years and my son is about to start his GCSE years??
He makes me travel further to collection/drop off point, when son is to be with him (every Wed, and every other weekend) he will not share the parental cover during the school holidays - it is all left to me to sort out, despite numerous emails asking him well in advance to look at dates and book in holidays...
I am at my wits end, as it is putting a huge amount of pressure on my relationship with my partner of 6 years, who quite frankly, has just had enough of the unfair treatment that he sees me dealing with on a day to day basis from my ex.
Alternate wkds Fri to Sunday is what my partner wants but she's convinced the children they want to see mummy and daddy every wkd so she doesn't have to change her wkd plans. In fact she doesn't want them all wkd as she can't cope and shouts at them a lot.
My partner has been trying to change this wkd routine for about a month however she's having none of it so we don't see the children as much atm which is very sad. He tried to change it by going to mediation about 2 years ago but didn't follow it through as the mother told the children evil daddy was taking her to court and she constantly cries in front of them. The children do get very upset by it as expected. She's emotionally abusing them and is playing the victim all the time to get what she wants. In fact she's the one being nasty and awkward and has been from day 1 since they separated 5 years ago.
What can be done without involving courts or the children so she has to change the routine and we don't lose out by not seeing the children or by having to pay her the full child maintenance bill due to the fact they don't stay overnight anymore because of her?
Any suggestions anyone? Many thanks
i have a question regarding the way we count "nights".
In the case of the daughter/son stays at the grand parents or another member of the family of the mother (or father) or spend a night at a friend's place (without the mother or father), how are those nights are counted?
thanks
kind regards
We both work full time. She earns more.
We both have mortgages. My mortgage is bigger.
We both buy clothes and school clothes for our children.
We split any school costs equally.
I also pay for afterschool club.
If me and my ex are having our two children stay with us an equal amount of time. Do I still have to pay her maintenance?
He pays £150 a month which was his set amount and I get it when he decides to pay me it, he refuses to set a direct debit up.
I went through child maintenance last year being sick of having to ask for his payment every month and also because I don't even know how much he earns so my daughter could be entitled to more support for all I know (you'd think working 7 days a week he would be earning a decent living).
He avoided Child maintenance for a good 10 month and when they caught up with him I got endless verbal abuse and they said from what they can see on his PAYE they will take £12 a week. This means according to his tax payment if he is working full time he isn't even earning half the hourly minimum wage. This suggests to me he isn't being very honest. (He has a very nice apartment, a van, a social life and recently had a nice holiday in NewYork).
Child maintenance were very keen to end the application saying I'm better off leaving it as it was and I felt really pressured to end it without any explanation on how they came to that amount.
But what do I do now, I feel like this man is lying and cheating the system to pay less and I'm back to having to ask him for his monthly payment which ends in nasty controlling texts from him, I've had enough after 8 years and still have 8 to go! Feeling really fed up!
my son too. My partners son is 17 this year and has been working full time since September in a private apprenticeship so earns a really good wage .
The original consent order from the divorce (2005) states he will pay £310 monthly until his son is 18 or finishes full time education whichever is the latter!
He was shocked as was I that he is still having to pay and obviously at the time never realised the 'latter' part of the agreement. He despite paying maintenance continues to provides regular holidays , pays for phone and clothes etc . Is there any way he can stop paying now or reduce it ? He believes he can't ? Any advice please
In his words, everything at his house is for his house. Nothing is alowed back to our home. So I repeated and made it clear that everything for our house stays here and he will have to get them clothes for his house as their clothes here are not leaving this house. Now we are constantly arguing over money, he is now cutting the children's money by over 50% this month to get them clothes for his house.
Myself and my ex partner split around 6 months ago, we have 2 children together and we both agreed that i would pay her maintenence privately.
I work an alternate shift pattern of 6-2 and 2-10. every other week "6-2 shift" i pick the children up from school feed them and drop them back to there mothers house, i also have them every other week end from the Friday after school till the Monday morning when i take them to school.
My question is if i feed/bath the children, do there homework etc when i have them from after school but then have to drop them off back to there mothers for bed time does this still class as there living with her? I see the children almost the same amount of time as there mom. But they don't stop at mine in the week and stop with there mom. Does this class as i don't count as the sleep nights counted are with her?
The mother earns more money pcm than me and refuses to pick them up or drop them to see me and leaving me with all the fuel costs etc,
Also demands extra money from me for the children to do out of school activities etc. When i pick the children up from school this saves her the cost of a childminder etc as she works full time and is still at work.
His ex partner (who his children live with) also demands he pays for their hair cuts and clothes for when they are with us. She refuses to pack clothes for them and says he is to buy their school uniform for when they are with us. As well as other clothes and shoes.
My partner also has to do all pick ups and drop off too - she refuses to drop them off or collect them, saying that if he doesn't do the lifts then he won't see them.
Please offer some advice as my partners scared she will stop access if he expresses his frustration.
Can we take money frothed can amount and pay schools direct ourselves, then we know the children ar
e eating
I was informed before this would be taken into consideration called 'variations' as she refuses to ever drive any of the Distance to meet me half way and I would be entitled to pay less per month. Is this true and do I NEED to pay for classes that happens when his mum has him? I paid for his football classes before when I took him and never once asked her for half the money
Thanks
Please clarify.
With regards to child maintenance I have two child both in full time eduction. I have been divorced from my ex for now two years. It was a long hard process and yet the consent order is still not completed also our child maintenance agreement is verbal not written or signed.
My question is the monies I reciecve is used for day to day care. My child had a trip due of which we agreed to share costs. Can the ex reduce maintenance payments of this ground?
In doing the calculation I calculated how many nights the children would spend with me in the year (being the weekends I have them plus the 3 weeks I will have them during holidays), and I end up with approximately 70 days, which puts me in the 52 - 103 days per year bracket which I have used to calculate the amount of maintenance due.
My ex has now asked me to take the children for an additional 2 weeks when she goes on holiday. My question is how do I reflect these additional 2 weeks (and any other times I take the children over and above the norm) in the calculation. Do I just add the number of additional days on to the 70 I already have them for and see whether this changes the maintenance due), or would I prorate the child maintenance in the month in which I have them the additional 2 weeks? Reason I ask is that it seems odd to be paying a 'full' child maintenance payment in a month when I have them for half the month.
He didn't pay any spousal or child maintainance as he had been made redundant from his job in investment banking. We left this open to use CSA or equivalent once he found work.
He has been back in work since 2012 but still does not pay any maintainance. I have been told by CSM that he doesn't need to as whatever he may pay (his salary is likely to be over £150K annually - he his supposed to supply his tax returns but doesn't) may be off-set against the £20k in school fees. Is this true? Or does he have to pay on top? My part time salary is £15K compared to his which is 10 times as much.
He has another child and co-habits.
I would like to know if I should pursue child maintainance or if it is not worth rocking the boat
I pay £49 a week to my ex for my 2 children, they both stay at mine a week and another, I have a partner and we live in our new home.
My ex is always asking for extra money, for school uniforms, school trips, school dinner, parties, extra activity like football, dance swimming, music, sport and school shoes, which I pay for when they are with me. The week they are with me I pay for the costs plus I pay child maintenance that should be used to cover all the yearly costs is that right?
She has a rich family back in Italy that send her money every now and then, and she is home owner too, here and in Italy.
When we split 4 years ago we sold the house and I gave her half of the money even if I had paid for the mortgage as she wasn't working most of the 7 years we have lived in that house.
Now she is asking for more money to cover ballet cloths and football school fees, it is getting ridiculous.
Do I need to pay all this extra money or pay only the Child maintenance, please?
Thanks for your reply
recently her circumstances have changed & she now has to pay school fees for our Daughter
The fee is at a reduced rate & Iam happy to pay half
but she has added the cost of School dinners into that fee
She has always had to pay for school dinners since the 1st year of School
so should I now pay half of that cost?
I rang the CMS to see what their opinion on this was and was told childcare would be my responsibility as I am given a reduction for the nights my child is with me, however, when I rang back about extra payment for school dinners, I was told that I only had to pay the CMS amount, anything else was voluntary. This seems a little contradictory.
While only paying the CMS payment may be the case in law, it is easy for my ex partner to say they wont pay for school dinners, leaving me no option but to pay for them or have my child go without lunch. Similarly with childcare and afterschool clubs, it is me that will be reprimanded by the school and reported to social services for not picking up my child.
My issue is this... originally, our informal arrangement for access was for me to collect after I finish work on week days, but my ex changed that to collection after school, leaving me to pay for childcare and afterschool clubs (some afterschool clubs on days with her too). This is leaving me with a financial struggle.
I have access 43% of the time, buy school uniform for days at mine(same items mum should need), school shoes, all the clothes for at mine, and everything else while at mine. I have my child at least half of school holidays and have paid for hobbies (scouts, swimming, etc) and holidays, as best as I can afford, certainly more regular than my Ex.
My ex's income is higher than mine, she is capable of owning her own home, whereas I cannot afford a home for my child, we are currently sharing a bedsit and have been for years, waiting for social housing which is all I can afford within practical distance of the school.
My ex refuses to let me keep my child on the one sunday night per fortnight (rather than return to the ex's at 5pm), giving me 50% access (after I pointed out that was the difference), so I cannot make a claim for child tax credit (she earns to much to claim but has overpayments, meaning I cant make a claim even if I had him the 50%) and obviously not child benefit.
I am paying for half of everything, more as she has no childcare costs due to family support, I get no support and find myself on the breadline and yet I still have to pay maintenance.
Also I am expected to pay half of the child care bills for after school clubs etc, I have recently however raised the point that I don't think I should be contributing to care costs for the nights he is not in my care, I'm pretty unclear as to the legal obligation I have with regards to paying childcare bills!! Any clarification on these matters would be appreciated.
Our child requires a childminder on days that her dad has her as he cannot pick her up from school. Is the cost of this childcare covered by his maintenance payment?
Thanks
Any advice would be greatly appreciated
Can you please advise if payments I make into a savings account for my son should be included when working out CSA payments to my ex partner.
I am not interested in anything from him concerning our childcare arrangements as he pays the legal minimum. However I cannot see why I should pay for his childcare!
Really appreciate if someone could shed some light on this please.
Many thanks.
My ex pays my £180/mth via Direct pay with csa.My son is 12 and stays with him 2 nights a week and we share school holidays equally.My son would like to go on a school trip which is £800.His dad has agreed to pay £100.He has told our son that he will need to get a job to pay the rest of his balance (£300)!He is happy for me to pay the rest of the balance (£400)!I am not comfortable with this suggestion and concerned for my son having to shoulder his fathers part of the school trip payment.Please could you help as mum and son getting a bit stresed!Much appreciated.
My wife and I separated just over a year . We have equal shared care of our children , one week on on week off. We used to share the cost of the children but my ex now says she wants to pay maintenance instead which would only be around £20 a week but she claims that I have to pay for everything for our children , even when the children are in her care , including any childcare she uses whilst she has them. Could someone please advise what I should have to cover during the week she has the children . I am in receipt of the child benifit and she wants to pay maintenance but should I be be covering the day to day cost , ie school dinners , before and after school care etc whilst it is her week ?
Thanks
I have been paying CSA direct for the last 2 years. My daughter has started school this year and is at after club most nights. I have my daughter for tea on a monday and she stays with me 8 days of the month.
The mum was working 3 days a week and now working 5 days a week after starting her own business, she has told after school that I have to now pay the the link club fee's for monday night as she now works.. I find it slap in the face as I pay CSA and provide clothes etc and Now I am expected to pay a extra £55 a month so she can go to work??? I have been told that no one will be there to collect my daughter from school on Monday next week and After School have told me she cannot attend there unless I pay £55 upfront. Basically she is holding a gun to my head.
My question is. CSA covers these costs correct??
I did not claim no csa of the farther of my child for ten years , I made a claim two years ago. he keeps job hopping when they go to attachment of earning.
I have agreed to take a less payment so he will pay. he dose not . its just not fair he dose nothing for his child I asked for an .i.e.c to witch I was told they cant do that .by csa agreed to take 200 pound a month 150 a month is what csa said he has to pay and 50 pound off areas he has paid the 200 pound 5 times in the last two years. but I only get 164 after deductions nw hes ment to pay 250 but refused so like I said I agreed to go to 200 . he quit his job countless time and deduction from earning is impossible how is he even able to claim benefit if he quits his job . I work 56 hours a week to support my boy I get to see him for an hour at bed time and half an our in the morning just to make the bills . if he would only pay I would only have to work 40 hours a week . its hart braking not been able to spend time with my son. please please please some one give me some advice I have been the only one to support my son for 13 years hes a good lad works hard I am so very proud of my hard work in raising a wonderful boy on my own .never asked for any hand out worked hard to show my son this is what you do . hes not spoilt hes had a paper round since he was nine just to give him self pocket money to feed his dragon that he saved up to get you have no idea how very proud I am ( at nine I went with him on his round not alone) he gets me a 2 pound bunch of flowers every month I wish I could spend more time with him . what I have to quit my job and go on dole just to spend time with him ...I could cry my self to sleep most night I look at my son and know why I carry on he gives me strength. please some one tell me is their a way to enforce him to pay .
I'm divorced and have two boys who live with me. They go to their dads alternate weeks. He pays maintenance and insists that when they go to him I have to provide all clothing etc and refuses to buy them anything extra for when they're with him. Can you please confirm if I have to provide all clothing even though the CSA keep a percentage of his weekly payment back for him to look after the children? I've even offered a huge bag of clothing for both
children to start him off so they can have clothes at his house rather than always having to take everything and come back with piles of washing for me? It would be good to understand what exactly I have to provide please. Thanks.
He has our son from Friday after school and has to return him back to school on a Monday under a court order. He is now saying because he has to pay child maintenance he's not responsible for providing clean school uniform on a monday as that is covered under the child maintenance and it's my responsibility. He's stated if I don't supply clean clothes for our son on a Monday then he's not taking him to school. Please could you confirm if he can do this? Many thanks
My husband and I have split, he hasn't made any payments so far. Can payments be back dated?
Also he refuses to pay nursery costs. We are both professionals however my career has suffered as I can only work part time to make sure they are looked after. If I were to put them both in full time care the costs would be 4 times as much as the csa payments.
Is there any help I can get?
I have checked the CMS calculator and it comes out at £156 pcm but will not tell me any great detail as to what else is included (apart from the few questions that are asked). My ex makes threats when I say I'm going to apply through CMS, stating that there are loads of hidden things they will take into account. I rang CMS for advice but unfortunately dealt with a man hating devil woman who wouldn't give me the time of day. I have my son 3 days a week and would love to have more money to spend on him while he's with me.
Can you help with exactly what they take into account apart from the few questions on the calculator?
Thanks in advance.
I am also going away, but don't have the luxury of not paying my mortgage/bills and all our child's clubs etc while she's away, and I will have bought all the summer clothes that she will be wearing too.
He sees her about 8 times a year, so I am always the one that bears the costs of holiday clubs / childcare, and I never get a break so I don't see why I should have to subsidise his holiday!
I am father of a boy. I do not have an agreement for visits, but I do see my son almos every weekend. I pay regularly money to my ex partner, actually almost double of what the CMA has decided.
My partner is travelling a lot to her homecountry and, she travel for holidays a couple of times per year in expensive travels (my son is going with her) I am really struggling to keep up with the payiments at the moment, but I want to do what is best for my kid. Can I ask her for receipit or enforce her to share with me how she spends the mony every month? She is unemploied, I do not know how can she afford it and I would like to make sure she is not abusing me or the system, it would be a terrible example for my son.
My ex has our 2 girls 2 days in the week. We both work full time and they are booked into breakfast and after school clubs - as was the arrangement when we were together. I have always paid for this and am continuing to do so...however I don't feel I should have to pay for clubs on the days my ex has them. He is utilising a service that I am paying for. He does pay maintenance £150 a month and also never helps out really during holidays and I have to have time off / book holidays clubs etc... He says it's my responsibility as I'm the primary carer. He also claims his £150 a month CM covers childcare - which it's not even half my monthly cost.
Any advice gratefully received.
Many thanks.
As we deducted a small amount for school uniform we were forced to buy from her last payment she has now asked for all his pension contributions breakdown. We said no, she now is going to csa/csm. A small amount of extra contributions are going into his work pension and deducted from his pay. Will the csa/csm make him pay her a percentage of this extra money going into his pension or will they deduct this from his gross figure.
Would csa take these expenses into consideration with there calculations. ?
I had a brief (a few days) romance with a girl from Moldova, after she returned to her country she informed me that she was pregnant - he is my son, it's obviously just to look at him. I want to pay the correct legal amount, but this is 25% in Moldova, and I can't afford that: I support myself & my partner in the UK and struggle to make ends meet.
The average salary in Moldova is currently £166 - 25% of this is £42 a month.
The most I could afford to pay is £200 - which considering the low cost of living in Moldova I feel is more than fair. However, if Moldovan law says 25%, what can I do? I am not legally recognised as the father, but if I am then I can't afford to pay this amount. An agreement with the mother is impossible, she tells me I should just pay the money and that any inclusion of me in my son's life would be distressing to him.
Can you help me to understand whether he is supposed to give her extra when she asks for it too?
Thanks Charlie
My ex husband pays £50 a week for our two children. Should the cost of swimming club and horse riding that is done out of school be taken out of this, or can I ask him to contribute to those clubs as well?
Thanks
I am Male and have 2 children to my ex for which I pay maintenance through the CSA for the past 6 years or so (this was her choice). I have the children 3 nights out of 7 every week and have the following questions:
1. My ex deems it is my responsibility to supply/ pay for childcare the days that I leave the children from my care to her designated childminder before and after school, (also during school holidays etc). is this legally enforceable?
2. In order to force me to adhere to question 1, she has stopped me seeing the children during school holidays, although morally incorrect, is she legally able to do this?
3.Also as a result of question 1, she is not giving me the childrens passports to allow me to take them abroad. is this also legally possible?
4.what is the best solution to get this sorted, have tried mediation without success and it is heading in the court direction. many thanks, all comments welcome
So yet again what if the PWC
earns more than you better life style than you obtained the
former home and has a good
pension.
Yet again all costs are pushed from governments to private agreements where I laugh my head off when it says talk to your ex partner and agree to finances..does any one realise when divorce happens no one ever talks and it goes nasty..
so in essance to this question what planet were the idiots in DWP thinking of apart from raiding fathers salaries.nor
My ex partner currently pays £100 per month maintenace. I currently do not use any after school child care for our child however my ex partner does. The cost of his child care works out to be just under £100. He is of the opinion that the maintenance that he pays to me should go towards his child care costs. Is this correct or does he need to pay for his own child care and still pay the child maintenance?
Thank You
Maintenance can provide essential funds for a number of specific items like school fees, nursery care or any medical expenses that the child requires. It is therefore acceptable to use maintenance monies to pay for expenses like residential heating costs, but not acceptable if it is used as spending money for luxuries. It means that you may not always see where the money goes as it may not be visible, for instance if your mother may choose to spend it on heating/electricity, other household bills, or school fees etc.
I has always worked well but now it is starting to become an issue.
Please help and advise as I don't know what to do.
She moved from herts to Norfolk and as a result I also moved further north to be closer, but due to work could not get closer than 80 miles away. I pick them up every Friday from school, and one weekend they'll come home with me, the other I'll just spend the evening with them, swimming or in the park etc. I put £230 per month aside for diesel and the food/entertainment when I'm in Norfolk with them on alternate Fridays. My ex also refuses to send any clothes so I have to provide a full wardrobe for them at my house too (they spend a lot of school holiday time with me too) for which I put aside £30 per month.
Despite having a reduction in wages two years ago and having another child with my current wife, I have never re calculated and lowered the maintenance. I have estimated that over the last 8 years I have spent in excess of £17,000 in diesel alone, she has only brought them to my home twice, both as she was passing. I have never asked for assistance or a reduction due to this.
In total therefore each month, not including pocket money or mobile phones I pay £710 per month.
She has just asked me for a contribution to school uniform, which I believed came out of maintenance. Previously I have assisted, but last year and this year I simply cannot afford to. She has said that it is disgusting that I am not providing fully for my children. That hurts - I have £15 a week to spend on myself including clothes! I have nothing more to give! Am I right or wrong as to where the money for school uniform should come from? What really does the maintenance pay for?
csa do not care how the money is spent they only care about the bussines.
I ask for help towards some clothes and shoes and school wear for our children but he just says to me, that's what CSA is for but yet he can go on holiday 3 times a year buy Raybans for every holiday 2 new iPads in 3 months and all other expenses.
Ive never asked for more money just some help every now and then, does CSA cover luxuries for children or am I just being a money grabbing person as he says???
She is a DR citizen the boy has dual nationality.
Would I be able to be her legal rep if she has to go through our courts.
Any advice woul.d be greatful
What should my ex be using this child maintence for as I keep getting asked by my daughter to buy new clothes or shoes and my ex keeps asking for extra help with music lessons/and or school trips! I was under the impression that the money I give him every month should cover all this and not for me to give him extra?
Is this the case or have I got it wrong?
Please help!??
Cn I sue him for child maintenance even when is only one month old
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