What Are Parents' Rights on Separation?

Author: Lorna Elliott

The break up of a relationship is always stressful and can leave one or both parents feeling lost, hurt and bewildered. When you separate from the other parent of your child or children, there are certain rights and responsibilities that you need to understand which will help you to make better decisions for yourself and your child.

Parental Responsibility

Mothers automatically have parental responsibility for their children. Fathers also have this right if they were married to the mother when the child was born. If you are an unmarried father, you will have parental responsibility if your name is registered on the child’s birth certificate. You can also get a court order to get parental responsibility of the child, which does not in principle require the consent of the mother. If you separate from your partner and child, you do not lose parental responsibility.

Financial Arrangements For Your Child

When you separate, you will both need to make decisions about the welfare and upbringing of your child. This includes where the child lives and with whom, how the parent who is not living with the child will have contact with the child, and how the child will be supported financially. If you cannot agree this amicably, you will probably need to go to court to have arrangements enforced. Other issues that separating parents should discuss are holidays, education, who has responsibility for taking a child to a doctor, and what would happen if one of you became too ill to care for the child.

It invariably costs more for parents to live apart than together and if financial arrangements are not made this can cause hardship for the child. No matter how angry you feel about what has happened in the break up of your relationship, you should always remember that your child’s needs must come first. If you are able to come to a financial arrangement between yourselves about your child (known as a ‘private agreement’) then that is often best, but it does mean that your arrangement is not legally binding. If payments are not made under a private agreement, the Child Support Agency cannot get involved and help you recover this money.

Child Support Rights Checker

Answer a few questions about your situation and get a clear summary of your child maintenance rights and options.

Try our Child Support Rights Checker free, here on this site →

What If We Can’t Agree?

If you cannot agree payment arrangements amicably, you may decide to use the CSA or get the court to decide. Using the court is likely to cost money, because you will have to pay court fees and will probably need a solicitor. Going to court over child support payments is not covered by legal aid, but if you are already going to court to determine other issues you can decide child support matters at the same time.

You should also look at changing your will after separation, or if you don’t have one, you should definitely make one! If you don’t have a will, your assets will be dealt with under the laws of intestacy. If you do have a will that is out of date, and your ex partner was the main beneficiary, your assets will go to your ex partner on your death.

What About Our Home?

In terms of property, one partner may decide to leave the family home. This can be problematic if the parents aren’t married, especially if a new partner moves in with your ex before arrangements can be finalised. In these situations, it is very important that you speak to a solicitor without delay. If you and your ex partner are married, one person automatically receives the other’s estate on death – which you will want to avoid if you have separated.

You don’t always have to sell your home on separation. You may be able to agree who pays the mortgage, or get a court order as to that effect. One partner may be able to buy the other partner out of the property, or you could decide to sell it at some point in the future.

Your situation may be slightly different. ask a question below ↓ and our editorial team will reply with our advice.

Do I Have To Go To Court?

Not all separations and divorces end up in court. Some people are content to use a separation agreement, or to enter mediation in order to come to an agreement about issues between you, your partner and your child. Mediation is often much less stressful than having to resort to court action, and can also be cheaper than litigation. That said, you will have to use the court if you decide you are going to divorce. There is no way around this.

Speak To A Solicitor

In short, if you can possibly keep negotiations amicable then this is best. Things do however have a tendency to deteriorate and you can find yourself very short of money, or without a home, or both, if you decide to leave. In these circumstances, you should always contact a solicitor.

The Next Step

Now that you have read through the advice above, you might want to put it into practice. Our Child Support Rights Checker lets you answer a few questions about your situation and get a clear summary of your child maintenance rights and options. Try it now →

127 questions

Ask Child Support Laws a Question

Ed 19/10/2022 at 4:54 pm

I'm a UK British citizen living in England. I'm wondering if it's possible to get some advice regarding parent responsibilities and legal contact rights under the Slovak Republic laws.

I have an 8 year old son who lives with my ex-girlfriend in Kocise and she cares for him. In 2014 shortly after my son was born we'd split up and she'd returned to Slovakia to live with her family and now has a flat of her own where they both live. I also contribute monthly childcare payments to her but not through any third parties.

At the time that she had returned to Slovakia in 2014 we were not on good terms and I was not listed on my son's birth certificate as his father. His mother wanted to return to Slovakia as soon as possible and his UK birth certificate was never amended. I believe my son has dual nationality or citizenship despite this.

Over the past 8 years, partly due to my employment issues and the pandemic, I have only managed to visit my son once or twice a year, although if I could afford it I would prefer to visit more often. I have been on good terms with my ex-partner, whom I'd had a relationship with since 2011, but it has sometimes been difficult where I feel she limits contact with my son.

Although I often message her on Whatsapp to request videocalls with my son, but these are infrequent as often she says she's unavailable, and only happen once every few months, and after repeated requests and arguing. Unfortunately, I don't speak Slovakian, and my son doesn't speak English, so my ex-partner has to act as a translator and host.

I understand, due to the circumstances where we're separate and living in two different countries, and both with financial difficulties, that it wouldn't realistic for me to have regular contact with my son, but I would like to ask for advice that my rights as a parent and legal rights be acknowledged and respected my ex-partner. I feel that she can be unaccommodating, aggressive and uncommunicative at times, and I am seeking some legal assistance as to how I can establish my rights for contact with my son in agreement with her as amicably and diplomatically as possible.

Grandland 19/09/2022 at 8:11 am

My daughter is in a terrible relationship,she has 2 children,in a fraught relationship,he has been unfaithful before,even fathering another child out with the relationship with my daughter,he regularly stays out all night,hardly takes anything to do with the children,doesn’t speak to any other family members,they have been together 12 years,and last year moved in to a new home,with the mortgage in his name only,any suggestions/advice as to what she can do

victor80 13/10/2021 at 2:23 pm

My husband can be quite verbally aggressive towards me and always have been especially when he drinks. I’m not perfect and have been aggressive in the past but I got professional help a few years back and one of the coping mechanism they helped me with was to remove myself from the situation, which I do but when I do this he just follows me and doesn’t leave me alone. Our daughter is 13 and has seen this throughout her life but now I’v had enough. I would like advice on how I deal with this and what help is out there? Any advice is welcome

Mom 15/08/2021 at 10:00 pm

Everytime when i have argument with my partner he chose to leave me. He disrespect me in every way. I m having 2 yr old daughter and pregnant for my second baby. I do not have job he is financially stable and give us financially support . But now things don't work in any way. He wants me to stay separate from him. How could i manage everything?

Hay 26/05/2021 at 5:47 am

My daughter really wants to go to camp but her father won’t let her... if she is with me that week do I need his permission to send her to a safe enjoyment camp with parents that I know and kids that are in her class?

Steffi 29/03/2021 at 8:58 pm

Me and my ex partner have a court order he has out boy every other weekend for 2nights but my son comes home saying that he stayed at his dads girlfriend house without with dad which I'm not happy about and with this pandemic my son shouldn't be sleeping in different houses can someone give me advice please

Da7thSon 15/02/2021 at 10:40 am

Its all well and good having Parental responsibility, but the law isn't strong enough as a consequence if someone does break it. My ex-wife has moved without my consent or consent of the courts, has changed schools for my daughter without my consent or consent of the courts and she just feels she can do whatever she wants with the children with or without my agreement. The police can't do anything and going to court at present is really painful in terms of the amount of time it takes; by which time any decision will be influenced by the unapproved actions of my ex-wife. It's an utter joke

twiggy 28/12/2020 at 4:05 am

Just separated from my husband, my children went to visit on Christmas day and now my husband refusing to bring them back to me .says iam an fit to look after them and they are going to live with him from now on .won't let me speak to them on the phone ,and they are not at the family home ,he has taken them to his mother's house. What are my rights .

Ozark 07/08/2020 at 11:36 am

Hi, for many years I have tolerated the verbal abuse and sometimes physical from my partner. She was suffering from Breast implant illness, and suffered a lot indeed. Now after explant she's getting healthy but her attitude never changed, manipulates reality, never ever recognises her abuse... And we have now a 3 year old amazing boy that suffers when the mother goes kuku breaking things or shouting loud... This is not right for no one. I have made my point and a separation needs to happen in order to save us all from caos.
I'm the father and I want my son to be with me... Its time for her to go and find her way. How can I have my son?

NewMum 19/06/2020 at 8:31 pm

My boyfriend is on our baby girls birth certificate - she is now 7 months old. He doesn’t do anything for her he has a daughter from a previous relationship which he is more concerned about and not looking after what’s under his nose. I’m fed up I love being a mum and It’s been so long now that I don’t want his help anymore whenever I’ve brought this up with him we argue like cat and dog he says he’ll try and help and he doesn’t. I want to leave but I don’t think he deserves to have the title dad and I don’t think he should spend time with our baby if we split, whenever I ask him to hold her she screams with him. Any advice please!

UnknownTerritory 11/12/2019 at 6:38 pm

Hello all, please can I tap into your expertise?
I live currently with my wife, our child and 2 step children in private rented accommodation. We have been married for 10yrs but unfortunately I have been fighting against a reality that my love for her is not what it once was and I am thinking that I have to leave as staying together for the kids will harm us both in the long run and potentially make us resent each other and spill over to the children resenting us.
I want to do right by them all financially and will pay whatever is required by law and more if i can. I have no idea of my financial obligations such as will I be required to pay the rent while my child is in full time education. If this is so then I will do it gladly but I need to be armed with all the facts.

Samy236 02/11/2019 at 5:45 pm

My partner got depression, she tried to commit suicide twice, always arguing, now she left me and took my baby back to her country slovakia how I can het my baby back

Lady In Black 18/10/2019 at 5:45 pm

Hi. As I am writing this right now my heart is in pieces... I just had an argument with my partner and we've been having these for the past few weeks and each time they have ended in him telling me that he's gonna take our daughter if I were to ever leave him. I am not worried about leaving however I am worried about him taking my daughter away from me. I am 25 he is 36, he has a job I don't because I had to move to a different city with him but things aren't working out now. We've lived together since before the time my daughter was born but he's not in her birth certificate but he's the only one who has a job and has been taking care of our daughter financially because we decided that I should stay at home with our daughter until she was sixteen months and now she's 20 months old. I am so afraid that he'll take her away from me because he's stable and has a job and I dont because that is something we had decided together. Please help I am really desperate to know what my future will look like. Thank you.

Genuine 01/10/2019 at 1:01 am

My girlfriend and I have separated. We have 2 daughters , I’m paying her child maintenance but I am being told by her that on top of child maintenance I’ve got to also contribute to all or part paying of her rent . Is this true

Danni 10/04/2019 at 12:43 pm

Hi I am not married but own a property with my boyfriend which I am leaving, my concern is he has autism and I don't think he's safe doing certain things with his 3 year old he needs support, his parents are controlling which will make decisions difficult.

Desparate mum 29/01/2019 at 7:08 am

I am separated from my husband of 18 years since October 2017 (mutual agreement). We love separately since and we have 2 kids together (6 & 7) that live with me. Kids are with dad each weekend at the moment.

When it became clear that we will never be back togheter my ex started seeing other wemen. I was single for at that time. It was never his concern that I am may be not fit to care for our kids on my own. He has never paid any child maintenance. He has refused to put any money toward kids well-being and told me as separation was my idea, money is my problem now. I have ended up paying my self for all the household bills and expenses, kids child care, getting them to and back to various doctors or hospital appointments with out a car as I don't drive. I have asked him for help but got refused on all occasions. On top of it we had quite a few loans for various things and he refused to pay anything towards when I asked him to move out. Most of loans were I my name as he was useless in arranging anything. So I was left with huge dept as well. I have manage to get help and my money problem got sort out a while ago. Then I've met my partner, we fell in love & and he moved in with me and kids. Since then all I get from my ex is a hustle. He wasn't happy that I & kids are happy and tried to make me to send my partner away.
He must have realised that it's not gonna happen so he stopped. It was all OK until today. He has heard 1/3 of the story/twisted gossip about a house party (New year eve) that happened at my house, unplanned by me. Kids were away with him for few days at that time. The story involves my current partner and local guy who I was friends before. It got bit heated up as my current partner tried to defend my honor. Unwanted gest was quickly removed, things got sorted after every one was sober.
Now, weeks after ex hears it and decided that I am not fit to care for my kids. I do not know what I would do if he took kids away from me. I got very upset and cried a lot today. My partner got upset too and even suggested to go back to his home town I that would help. My kids love him and he loves them too. He's a really good guy and helps me a lot around the house that if feels weird sometimes as my ex to be husband hardly helped at all. He was like a tenant in B&B.

I need some advise as I am loosing my mind what could happened now.

Kids are due to see their dad for the weekend but I fear that he will refuse to bring them back. What should I do NOW? I am so desperate. HELP

Stressed dad 19/11/2018 at 7:52 pm

Hi my wife moved out yesterday and has been threatening to report me for Domestic Violence if I do not agree to pay half of her rent, the bills and provide certain furniture. We have 3 kids and she has reported me for DV before but I was released with no charge or anything. She is constantly threatening me, using the Police and DV as a whipping tool ( I have never touched her). I would like to know, am I legally obliged to meet her demands (half ret, bills etc) if we are not divorced yet? Thanks

AS 19/10/2018 at 11:16 pm

Hi, I’ve been with my partner 8 years and have a 6 year old son. We’ve sadly fallen out of love and have been continuously arguing for 18months/ 2 years. I’ve been wanting to leave him but he keeps saying I can’t take our son with me and he will fight me for sole custody. He’s also said if I do take our son and let him visit he won’t return him as he’s got rights being on the birth certificate.
The only reason I’ve stayed is because of these threats as I don’t want to be separated from my son.
What steps can I take to leave him and to make sure our son isn’t affected by this as I want him to grow up with both his parents in his life and not around us arguing.
My partner is verbally and emotionally abusive towards me but a fantastic dad and I have a history over 10 years ago of violence in my past which my partner threatens to use against me.

ChildSupportLaws Editor 02/07/2018 at 11:46 am

Unfortunately, we are unable to help in this instance as it will be up to the court to decide what it thinks is in the best interests of your child. If the court decides that you are not guilty of assualt, you have a better chance of requesting access, If your partner owns your home, then you have little rights over it unless you can register a beneficial interest. , which will explain your rights more fully. In your case, you may wish to seek legal advice in order to fully explore yoru options. The CAB can help with free legal advice.

Woody 01/07/2018 at 6:35 pm

Hi, my ex-partner has accused me of domestic abuse and giving her a black eye (of which I am innocent and have a recording of her saying just that)...she got drunk at Centre Parks while away with our 5 year old daughter and came back with it in april...the police have charged me and I am in court in August...i have been the main carer to our kid since she was born, technically a stay at home dad as she has a career etc...she owns our home and I am now homeless, no kid, no money, no job...and she is saying that she wants a residency order for our daughter and i have no rights to any kind of settlement wether to do with contact or financial etc etc...please help...many thx...

ChildSupportLaws Editor 01/06/2018 at 2:10 pm

Your son's only recourse is to take the matter to court, Social Service cannot help in terms of child access - only a court can do this. If your son is under bail conditions, he would also need to take legal advice to see whether he has a case.

Debz 28/05/2018 at 6:22 pm

I stumbled across this page desperately looking for advice,my son as been in a abusive marriage, but has a child with his partner,many of his family tryed desperately to get him help ie different advice places but he had to contact them himself, unfortunately six days ago my son was aggressively attacked by his partner where he had hold of his little girl,he managed to get out the home and tryed to contact the police,his partner viciously grabbed his phone off him and left deep scratch marks to a old skin grafted arm,she contacted the police and they acted in her favor because she phoned first and lied that she had been assaulted my son was arrested an was kept in custody til next day,my son isn't not allowed near his mortgage home that he pays for as she doesn't work and on benefits she's stopped my son seeing his little girl . He's up in court this week and can't get his items that belong to him,as the bail conditions. What rights has he got because his partner is dominating every situation,she's also asking a third party for my son transfer money to her for the baby but he can't because of the bail contact iam so worried about my grandaughter and son mental state of mind. I have contact services relating to my grandaughter but iam worried sick my son will dishome me because he thinks child services will take his little girl

ChildSupportLaws Editor 22/05/2018 at 2:21 pm

The parent that generally has the right to look after the children on separation is the parent who looks after them on a day-to-day basis. If your husband is named on the tenancy agreement, he can ask you to move out. If you go, you are within your rights to take your children. The Women's Aid link here may help if you wish for some further advice.

Meme14 22/05/2018 at 1:48 am

Hello I'm lost I need advice im a full time mother for 3 children aged 7 , 4 , 2 I had a bad life with my husband we arguments all the time I have asked him to divorce but her refused and he told me if you got to the court the children will be with me not you because you not working and the tenancy under my name and I will be left alone no kids no home nothing , it's been over two years now I'm scared I don't know what to to the children services get involved one and the police twice because he hit me what shall I do ? Dose he have right for children in case I got to court for divorce ? Who has the right for children in this case ?

ChildSupportLaws Editor 04/05/2018 at 2:13 pm

If you are currently the main day-to-day carer for your child, then it is likely a court will allow this to continue. If you have your name on the tenancy agreement, then when a relationship breaks down, both parties remain entitled to occupation of the family home. You can see more via whichwhich will tell you all you need to know regarding your rights.

ChildSupportLaws Editor 04/05/2018 at 1:51 pm

There is no law which says he has to provide you with this information. Likewise, you are under no obligation to provide him with the information (if you also take the children away). Ideally, it should be discussed and agreed between you. Many parents are courteous and will give the other parent details. For others, it remains a bone of contention.

Grey 03/05/2018 at 11:33 pm

Hello I was wondering if I can have some advice, I've never been through anything like this before, me and my partner have broken up. He has chucked me out of our shared council house, both of our name are listed on it. He also insisted he wants mains responsibility of our 4 year old son. But he claims I won't be allowed because I work unsocialable hours, I'm even happy to leave my job or ask my manager to move my hours. I only do 16hours. My sons dad doesn't. I really don't know what to do.

Sarah Jane 03/05/2018 at 10:58 pm

Hello I would like some advise please,

I have two young children,my ex the children's father is taking the children for the weekend on a trip away,I have said I would like the details of where they will be going and the hotel details, in case of emergency.

My ex has been refusing to provide me with the detail.I am the main carer for the children, who live full time with me.

Legally where do I stand,does the children's father need to disclose this information

Thank you

Twins2017 27/03/2018 at 10:07 pm

Me and my partner are on the verge of breaking up. We have twin girls (10minths old) and I'm currently 12 weeks pregnant. We all live in his house, my car is the family car. If me and the girls did move out we would live with my parents for a while until we got a house of our own. He doesn't have a clue on dealing with the girls, I'm the one always dealing with them. He never interacts with them either. He drinks alcohol every night (at the least 3 cans of lager, at the most 6 cans), I haven't drunk a drop since before my first pregnancy. I want to know, by law do the children come with me and can I stop him and especially his family from seeing the children??

Wayne ascroft 30/01/2018 at 1:12 pm

hi.
im goin through such a bad time with my ex partner at minute i have 15 yr old boy, she has 11yr old and 6 yr old girld and we have a 2yr old autistic daughter together! im asking my ex to leave as shes made my life hell with her aggression and mental abuse and she trys makin me lose my job and control me. i own my house shes lived in since june 17! i bought in april 17! she he seems to think she can have the house and laughs in my face. im an hgv drver by trade and she purposely tortures me making me stay up all night without no sleep wen i up at 530 am to drive. she keeps threatening set me up so she gets as she wants shes on dla for mental health and plays on ot. im soo deppressed i need her away from me no matter how much it will kill me not seein my baby girl everyday . please advise

M 28/01/2018 at 10:51 pm

My husband has been caught out lying (not cheating this time) and I have had enough and want to separate and he doesn’t. We have a toddler and I’m currently 7 months pregnant. Our house is in both of our names but I own a higher percentage with a declaration of trust due to me paying the deposit.
He refuses to move out or sell and I really can’t live with him without it effecting our children. Where do I stand? I have no where else to live but he could move back with his parents.

ChildSupportLaws Editor 25/01/2018 at 12:13 pm

I am sorry to hear this. Unfortunately, your daughter has two options if she cannot agree with her ex and that is to suggest mediation in the first instance in order to come to a workable arrangement, and if her ex is still being difficult she would have apply to court. As in all cases, the court’s main concern is the welfare of the child in question. The court will always put the child’s best interests first and this main issue will determine the outcome of any application for an order. Cafcass are also likely to get involved. The Cafcass staff who compile the reports are known as children and family reporters. It’s their job to interview both parents in the case, as well as the children, and any others who might be needed, which could mean social workers, medical professionals, or relatives. From the interviews they conduct, the reporter will determine two things: whether there should be contact allowed, and, if so, how much. It’s a measure of how important the Cafcass recommendation is that the court will almost invariably adhere to it. Once an order is in place, both parents will have to stick to the order.

ChildSupportLaws Editor 25/01/2018 at 10:53 am

You don't say whether the father is registered on the birth certificate and whether he has parental responsibility. If he doesn't, he cannot take your child away from you, as if he tries the police can intervene. If he does have PR, and you feel he may take your child and refuse to give him back, or you have evidence of threats, then you may wish to apply for a child arrangement order through court which will determine where your child should officially live

Mommy 24/01/2018 at 11:11 am

Hello.
Hope will find some advice here.
I am mom of baby boy, and biological father (after DNA test) is more than sure that he can take a full custody of child and take baby away from me.
He has never been involved in our presence (just for short time in middle of pregnancy), since then never been interested in baby’s wellbeing and in baby’s existence . because of his emotional behavior we split.
I have been reported to police his abusive and threats to police (case is ongoing now).
As he is threatening take a child away from me- where do I can seek advice, as I would like to keep Bio Father as far as possible from us.
Many thanks

Jeffery 24/01/2018 at 7:48 am

My niece has just separated from her boyfriend. He has take her son with him as she has had a few problems with drink and depression. She has also taken 3 overdoses in the last 3 months. Has is getting professional help and has a lot of support in place. Her partner is making it difficult for Her to see her son. He is refusing to let her have her son for the weekend without him being present. Even thou she will not be alone with him as she is staying with me.help please as dont know what we can do.

ChildSupportLaws Editor 22/01/2018 at 10:33 am

The CAB whichshould answer your question in full. If you are the primary carer of your son then you may have some rights to stay in the house. Much depends upon the length you have been with your partner etc. The article will elaborate more regarding this.

Juliet 21/01/2018 at 1:35 pm

Hi, just looking for some advice. I have a 3 month old son, and we live in my partners house- the mortgage is fully his. I dont want to be with him anymore due to constant rows and argurments in front of our son. I dont work, he earns the money and owns the house so how do i go about leaving him? I dont know where to start or what to do!

ChildSupportLaws Editor 15/01/2018 at 3:19 pm

Anything that you cannot resolve between you and your ex directly/mutually, should be resolved through mediation

Lonely dad 13/01/2018 at 10:34 am

Hi, my wife walked out a few months ago, taking my 12 yo with her. Things have been rocky since then between me and my ex, which has caused problems with our son. She let's him decide what he wants to do so therefore I do not see him for a couple of weeks at a time, even though they are very close. I also feel because she's living with her sister there is a bad influence from them, even though my ex says they just say do what you want to him. I believe that doesn't help, as he will feel obliged to stay close to his mum. Because of the problem between my ex and me (mainly because of me having a mental breakdown) communication is hard and sometimes none. I want to see my son more often but what's the easiest way without court? Thank you

Desperate 26/12/2017 at 9:53 pm

Hello.
Hope will find here some advice
I am a mom of 6monyhs old baby, baby’s biological father never been involved in pregnancy time and since now. As we have difficult relationships- I have been reported to police his abusive behavior/ and like to revenge he wants to make a DNA and as he will be proven as father- he wants to make full custody of child and take him absolutely away from me.
I am desperate and in schock- because do not know what to expect- I am desperate to loose my child.
Please can you give some advice
Many thanks

ChildSupportLaws Editor 05/12/2017 at 11:49 am

Obviously, if the other parent is your child's father, then it is likely he is going to be upset over any changes in the arrangement if it means seeing his child less. Therefore, your only option would be to suggest mediation as a way of trying to negotiate around this issue. If your ex disagrees with your suggestions, then he will have the option to take the matter to court. As in all cases, the court’s main concern is the welfare of the child in question. The court will always put the child’s best interests first and this main issue will determine the outcome of any application for an order.

H 04/12/2017 at 6:27 pm

Me and my ex have been separated for a few years now and things were always quite easy to resolve and to organise between us both and we were very civil up until the last 6 months where it has been a nightmare.
I want to change the days/times that my daughter goes to her dads house but I’m worried about the backlash. He always acts like he has a big chip on his shoulder and that he misses out. We changed the times etc so that he saw her a little bit more but I don’t feel as though it’s beneiftting her. She’s unsettled and is having accidents at bedtime and sometimes during the day, she’s been referred to a clinic because of this. Her dad has a new girlfriend and has bought a house with all all in the last few months and that has defiantly taken a role in her being unsettled and it’s just not fair on her. I would rather he only saw her every second weekend and that she stayed with me through the week for school etc, my job allows me to be there to drop and pick her up everyday. I’m there 24/7.
I just don’t no if I have a leg to stand on and what to do now.

ChildSupportLaws Editor 04/12/2017 at 11:50 am

Your ex must get the permission from you to take a child abroad, If you refuse, then he would have to apply to court. Unless your ex is the day-to-day primary carer of yours/his child, then it is unlikely he would be given permission to take your child out of the country, unless you agree.

sressed mom 03/12/2017 at 6:41 pm

I am a mother of 3 yrs old son his father and i got separated the past few month we were never married
now that ive decided to end things with him he claims that he wants full custody of our son and the thing is that he want to take him to mozambique am afraid i might not see him ever again

What should i do ??

Desperate mom 24/11/2017 at 3:25 pm

Hello. Would like to ask for advice regards my situation, as I am desperate and in real fear to loose my baby.
Situation is- I split with biological baby’s dad at 4/5 month of pregnancy- due to his abusive behavior, mostly emotional abusive, the same behavior continued for a while (when I was pregnant ) - abusive and negative, even threats to kill. I blocked him everywhere I could- because his behavior made me stressed. Then he started to send deadly threats to my present boyfriend (threats with weapons) and in last days of my pregnancy he send a threats to kill all my family.. During this time- he never asked about how is pregancy going.
I had a extremely hard birth of my baby- my present partner was only one there for me, like all pregnancy time.... He is the best dad I could imagine..
I reported to police all ex- partner (baby’s natural dad abuse), he got catched now (baby is 5 months) and again is threatening me- that he will took away baby, he will request DNA and will put me in prison (I had been in police in past, but never been convicted- always been not guilty), he is saying to police fault statements regard my past police deals and threaten me- that because of that he will put me in prison, take away baby. He is lying to police that my friends are criminal, alkoholocs etc and he want save the baby from bad people...
But all this time (when ai blocked him- he has NEVER asked a word Regards baby wellbeing, health etc)
I am afraid that he can do it, take away m baby - he is criminal, dangerous person- where can I seek for legal advice and help and get ready to defense myself in court and keep rights for my baby..
Thank you

ChildSupportLaws Editor 19/10/2017 at 2:38 pm

You can see what you need to do which

Ramy 17/10/2017 at 10:55 pm

Hi
I lived with my partner 2 years and one week ago i gave burt to my daughter but

I would like to mention that my partner is no longer living with me at the same address and I remained single mother and sole support. What should i do please
I need to say that im a single mother

ChildSupportLaws Editor 12/10/2017 at 11:07 am

Before you are allowed to apply to court for access, you are required to attend or ask your ex if she will consider attending mediation in order to come to an agreement regarding access. Taking the matter to court can be very stressful and emotionally upsetting, especially if your ex decides to withdraw all access while the court case is pending. However, in some cases it is necessary in order to get regular access to see your child, or you end up living in a state of limbo. You may wish to seek legal advice in order to fully explore your options.

Kevin 10/10/2017 at 8:22 pm

Me and my ex partner were in a relationship for a year when we had our 7month old son. We both have our own homes but the childs lives with his mum. I only see my son when it suits her, she never calls me to let me know how my son is and most of the time when i get in contact with her to talk to the child she makes up excuses so i cant see him. I dont know what people are around my son and anytime i try to make arrangements every week and all i get is a load verbal abuse down the phone! She also wont allow my child to come to my house. My house is a nice tidy home and there no reason why i should suffer like this. Im scared if i go to court it could cause more trouble than good. I need help ASAP as it is making me very depressed and hurt that im missing out on being with my son when hes growing up and learning!

ChildSupportLaws Editor 08/08/2017 at 12:08 pm

You can see more via the CAB link here which will highlight your options. You might also wish to seek some legal advice regarding this matter.

Lee 07/08/2017 at 8:37 am

I have been with my partner 5 years and have 2 young children together. We've recently split and he owns the house we live in. Would I have any rights to stay in this property? He's plan is to sell it in the fu ture.

ChildSupportLaws Editor 27/07/2017 at 11:17 am

The courts' guidance states that unless a breach is regular and intentional, they will not usually take action to enforce the order or punish the breach. Further it is important to consider the needs of your child first and so some flexibility may be needed on occasion. However, if your ex is consistently breaching the order, then you should note each time down each time he commits a breach, should you need this as evidence in court later on. As a rule, any changes to a contact order must be agreed by both parties. One party cannot unilaterally decide to change the order or apply additional terms. If they wish to do so, they will need to refer the matter back to the courts. If your ex is flouting this, then he is breaching the order. A solicitor's letter reminding your ex of the terms of the order and what your actions will be if he does not keep to the terms may do the trick

Lou 25/07/2017 at 2:42 pm

Me and my ex partner (of 13years) we have a 4yr old. we went to court last year over child arrangements and basically he has never stuck to it and continuously uses work as an excuse for not having our son when he should not to mention his social life now! Me and my family bend over backwards to accommodate him when we shouldn't and it's so frustrating.... not to mention the inconsistently of his parenting with our son who doesn't know from one week to the next when he will see his Dad, it's always left to me to let our son know daddy won't be picking him up etc. I work yet I have to work around our son I can't start work when they need me to but as a parent you have to work around it it just seems he can do what he wants yet the minute I was to breach the court order he'd have me dragged back to court. Luckily our son is still young and doesn't really ask where daddy is. He's always late, then turns up no explanation or anything, lies about working away and is very much on holiday, ditches his son on the days he's meant to have him to take other people away, he just expects me and my family to be there when he can't. He just doesn't think about our son or put him first! I want to know where I stand in terms of putting a stop to this and basically telling him what's gunna happen if he doesn't abide by the order! He also doesn't pay his child maintenance on time or at all, at the moment when he's in work and has a good job, he's been on 2 holidays this year and did not send a penny for his son it does go through child maintenenance but they seem to keep giving him chance after chance to pay so it's like no matter what he has a court order or child maintenance he doesn't abide by anything and does as he pleases! Any advice would be great.

Rita 20/07/2017 at 12:08 am

Hi I'm married and on 10 years route to get British passport n my three year old gilt is British if I want separation cos there are so much problems in life don't need this hell life what's are my mother right towards my British child but I have no job and house can I my baby with me ? What could I do?

Ol&* Editor 04/07/2017 at 3:44 pm

@Louise - if the matter has to go to court generally it's the primary carer who is given preference with regards to accommodation as it is seen as being in the best interest of the child to have a roof over their head. However, if you separate you cannot expect your ex to continue to pay the rent unless agreed. If your partner has parental responsibility of your child, then he can legally take the child and the police cannot intervene, this is the remit of the courts. As in all separations, it is always best if parents can agree between themselves.

Louise 20/06/2017 at 7:19 pm

Hi. I've been with my partner 4.5 years. We are not married, live together and have a 2 year old. I am planning a separation. I am the primary carer of our child who is currently under assessment for autism. We have a joint tenancy agreement. In the event of separation, who would be required to move out? He pays the rent but I'm the primary carer for the child. Also, can he legally take the child? He has threatened to before, but I know he wouldn't cope and it's not in the interests of the child.

ChildSupportLaws Editor 12/06/2017 at 3:49 pm

You would have to either broach this to your partner directly, suggest mediation, or if she refuses to attend mediation, take the matter to court. Much depends upon who is the current primary carer of your children (i.e who takes most responsibility in thier day-to-day care). The person who is primary carer is the person who usually continues the role, unless agreed otherwise.

Brian 09/06/2017 at 2:49 pm

I have been with my partner for 7 years she has 2 girls ages 12 and 9 we have 4 year old twins ( my name on birth certificate). She wants a separation I understand the girls will want to be with her but I dont think she can cope with all 4 of them and want the boys with me. What are my rights

ChildSupportLaws Editor 11/05/2017 at 12:12 pm

If your partner has parental responsibility then you will have to request his consent to move out of the area. If he declines, then you would have to apply through the courts and the courts will decide upon what it thinks is in the best interests of your child.

Fed up 10/05/2017 at 5:57 pm

I am currently in a relationship with a partner of a few years. We have a 2 year old. We are currently living with parents due to financial issues. I want to leave him and move area, somewhere cheaper. I want him to have shared responsibility but it will be more difficult when we move. Can he stop me from moving ?

ChildSupportLaws Editor 19/04/2017 at 2:32 pm

A court would not force you to sell the house as it will always decide upon what it thinks is in the best interests of your child and that is having a permanent roof over your child's head. However, some financial and access agreement needs to be made and therefore if you can't resolve the matter between you both, mediation is the next step. You also may wish to seek some legal advice regarding this. If your ex continues to withhold access, then you may have to consider taking the matter to court. A judge will not condone holding a child to ransom with regards to financial issues.

Ro 15/04/2017 at 9:02 pm

My husband has been out of work for the last two years. He is not actively seeking work either, just at home all day. He's been living off me for a long while(living in my flat, driving my car) and makes constant provoking/sarcastic comments towards me and in front our 3 year old daughter. I've had enough and several times asked him to move out of my flat, so that he has some sense responsibility, but he refuses. He says that if he does, he is taking our 3year old (picks her up) . What can I do to legally separate from this man?

Jleighc 13/04/2017 at 9:39 pm

Me and my partner have just seperated after 6 years. We arnt married and have a mortgage aswell as a 18 month old. She has taken my keys off of me and she will only let me have my child one a week. She wont sell the house and expects me to pay the mortgage still on top of child maintanance which i agreed to pay £75 a week. It should have been such a simple seperation as things just wernt working and now she wants everything and blackmailing me to see my child. I know i will need a solicitor but just wanted some quick advice. Thank you.

kath 03/04/2017 at 10:05 pm

I just wana know what is my rights as a mother. Im filipina woman who married with british national and we got married in the philippines last 2014. Now we have 15 month old daughter and Im 2 months pregnant. We are here now in uk as a tourist but my 15 month old have right of abobe here in uk because she is half british.. now we are separating and my question is where my child have to live? with me or with the father?

Anonymous64269 12/03/2017 at 2:31 am

My partner has decided after 3.5 years that she no longer loves me and has decided to leave.
We have an 18 month old and a 30 month old. I bought our family home approximately 2 years ago and is in my name. She is moving in with her mother tomorrow and leaving the children with me as we don't want to upset their routine. I am completely broken and love her dearly and I just don't know what to do and where I stand. Can some please help me understand where I stand?
Thanks

Carly 08/03/2017 at 7:45 pm

My husband and I have been separated for over 2yrs now. He is American and had a visa but chose to go back to America. We have a son together who stayed with me. He is now inquiring about how to come back to the UK. Do you know if this is possible as we both have no interest in reconciling but I have no objection to him being in the UK to have a relationship with his son. We have both since moved on in relationships. I now I have partner of almost 2yrs and a child with him and I believe my husband is in a relationship.

Tip 08/03/2017 at 5:02 pm

Hi I have recently chosen to leave my partner and our 10 week old baby (personal reasons that I do not want to go into on here). I do want to be a mother to my child but I am unable to be right now. What rights can I and my partner have in relation to our son that would not mean that we have to go through courts. I don't want to completel sign over my rights to the father as I do want to be his mum. What options are available for us?

ChildSupportLaws Editor 06/03/2017 at 3:01 pm

If the court has awarded a contact order that says you can see your child, then in the first instance I would ask your solicitor to write a letter to your ex reminding him of the terms of the order and the repercussions he faces if he does not adhere to it. Any contact orders made after 2008 should include a standard warning notice at the bottom of the order. This notice warns the parties of the consequences of failing to comply with the order.
If your ex ignores this, your only option is to apply back to court to have the order enforced. In order to apply to the court for enforcement of a child arrangement order (or contact order / residence order), you will need to fill in, issue and serve form C79 (which can be found on the HMRC website). There are a number of options open to the court in order to punish the offending parent and try to ensure that the breach does not occur. Which route the court takes, will depend upon the circumstances including the severity and frequency of the breach, and where the child resides. I hope this helps.

Dog 06/03/2017 at 7:57 am

I would like to know my rights on seeing my baby after at court he judge said he can live with his dad but the judge also said we have to arrange contact between us, I'm his mum and his dad is very controlling he won't let me see my baby now for nearly weeks , what can I do

Alan 20/02/2017 at 9:15 pm

I work for an airline and got home from a 6 day trip to find my rental home empty. My wife had left with our daughter without my knowledge . I had been having discipline issues with my 14 yr old stepdaughter for years. Now my wife who moved into a new flat without telling me where she was, is demanding money for our 4yr old daughter . I would sell my soul for my daughter and have paid nearly £400 this month alone in food and clothing as well as paying my wife's mortgage as well as other bills for my stepdaughter . I went without food for two days last month. Now I'm being told by my wife that she doesn't want me to see my daughter because I'm unstable due to my anger and verbal rebuke towards her. I have also given my wife £95 this month for our daughter . I am guilty of saying nasty things through drink and anger but my child is never at risk from either. My world has been turned upside down over the last six months. My daughter is with me now until I go away on Saturday , I have her for half the month when possible. What are my rights as a father!!!!!!!

Aimee 10/02/2017 at 8:22 pm

I have a friend who had a one night stand with his ex and now she is pregnant. She is refusing to allow him to see the child or attend anything unless he splits from his new partner. What rights does he have?

ChildSupportLaws Editor 07/02/2017 at 12:11 pm

You would really have to negotiate this between you and your ex and if you cannot agree, suggest mediation. Mediation takes place in front of a neutral third party. The mediator has no pre-conceptions and will not force you to make an agreement. They will assist the two parties in taking turns in the conversation, and helping you reach a decision that you are ready to agree with. Mediators do not pass judgment or offer guidance; they are there, in effect, to facilitate conversation between the two sides. Also, mediation is confidential and there is nothing to lose and, potentially, a lot to gain. Best of all is an agreement that you and your ex partner can work with to make sure it is resolved in the best interests of your children.

AJ 06/02/2017 at 5:53 pm

My husband and I have been separated for over a year now and he has been with his new partner for about that time also. We both came to an agreement for him to have our youngest son live with him as my eldest who is only 7 is violent to our 6 year old as he has autism and struggles with social interaction. We still have shared custody as my youngest stays every day after school for 3 hours and stays over night every other weekend. My ex works but can he stop me looking after my youngest during the holidays and have his girlfriend look after him instead?

ChildSupportLaws Editor 02/02/2017 at 1:53 pm

There are no set rules to say when your ex should and should not have your child, which means it is negotiable between you both. If you cannot agree, you should either consider mediation or your ex will have the opportunity to take the matter to court and let the court decide what level of access is deemed to be in the best interests of your child. Once a court order is awarded both parents have to stick rigidly to it. Therefore, if you can, you should try to negotiate outside court.

Gem 01/02/2017 at 1:45 pm

Hi I had a baby a week before moving in to a house with my partner. He is now mentally getting on at me and I've left.
He is now saying our 16 week old baby has to stop with him every Friday, Saturday and come home Sunday. I'm not ready for him to stop over night but mind him having him in the day.
He's on the birth certificate

ChildSupportLaws Editor 27/01/2017 at 12:27 pm

Yes, you should certainly look into the matter further and seek legal advice. A court will always put the welfare of the children first when considering any asset split of this nature, or who should be allowed to live in the house.

Jane 26/01/2017 at 7:18 pm

Hi. I've split from my boyfriend after living with him for 5 years in the house that he jointly owns with his Dad. We have 2 children together aged 3 and 4. However because of our differences he's asked me to leave with my children, so I'm staying with family. I've never contributed to the property, in the way of mortgage or utility bills etc. Do I have a right to stay in the house, at least for my children's sake? Or can I force him to sell the house and get some money to start a new life. Thanks

Piperson 23/01/2017 at 9:36 pm

I divorced my wife several years ago and have court appointed parental custody of our child. My ex always bad mouths me to our child to the point I would call it mental abuse. As a result our child is becoming more aggressive,not doing well at school and is generally very unhappy. Is there any way I can stop my ex from contacting our child?

ChildSupportLaws Editor 20/01/2017 at 2:18 pm

You would have to approach the REMO unit via the link here and check whether your country is a member country.

Shaney 19/01/2017 at 11:21 pm

Me and my husband been together for 7 years. Our child born on October 2009. We got married January 2010. I am an Asian and currently live in the Philippines. My husband just see us every 3 months since he's working in UK. Now that we are separated since he got another girl I'm worried about our child's welfare. I only do part time job,what can I do about financial support from my husband. Hope to hear from you ASAP,thank you very much

ChildSupportLaws Editor 09/01/2017 at 1:00 pm

There are no specific rights either parent has that says it is right or wrong for your children to meet your ex's new partner etc. As both of you have parental responsibility it is up to you to negotiate between yourselves, if you cannot come to mutual agreement, then you may wish to consider mediation. Mediation is when two or more parties meet to resolve problems before the matter reaches court. It is most often used in family proceedings and is a formal negotiation. The courts can accept the agreement of the mediation instead of having to go through the court process, although it is subject to final court approval. Mediation takes place in front of a neutral third party. The mediator has no pre-conceptions and will not force you to make an agreement. They will assist the two parties in taking turns in the conversation, and helping you reach a decision that you are ready to agree with. Mediators do not pass judgment or offer guidance; they are there, in effect, to facilitate conversation between the two sides. If your ex refuses mediation and you still refuse to stop access for instance, then he would have to take the matter to court for the court to decide.

Foxy 08/01/2017 at 10:18 pm

Please can you give me some advice my husband and I seperated he met someone else once we split he had only known her for a weekend & moved in with her & her kids I do not want my children staying or going to this women's house until they have been together at least 6 months & I know it is serious between the two them. I don't think this is unreasonable we both agreed that when we met new partners the children would not meet Them for at least 6 months & even then only if it was a serious relationship & we had met the new partner first! However he has now changed his mind & wants my kids to be staying there with her & her two children for weekends they have only been together just over a month! What are my rights please??

ChildSupportLaws Editor 05/01/2017 at 2:46 pm

If you are not married, then it depends on several factors such as how long you have been together, who will be the primary carer of your children, please see CAB link here which wil explain more. If you have lived in the property with the father of your children for a considerable amount of time and have contributed to the upkeep etc, you may be able to register an interest which may give you some financial rights. If you are the primary carer of your children, then a court may allow you to stay in the home until your youngest child finishes full-time education. However, you would need to seek legal advice in order to explore your options.

Hilda 05/01/2017 at 12:30 am

I've been together with father of my kids for 21 years.Unfortunately we both are not on the same page and I belive is best for the both of us to separate. Our kids ages are 20,14,12,7, so my question is what rights do I have to stay in the home . The house is only under his name .

Carla 01/01/2017 at 4:10 pm

Hello, me and my partner have separated and he taken our 2yr old son and won't bring him back and now he is trying to take our 6 months old daughter away! He is telling me I am not a fit mother when I clearly am I have a stable home for my children and my partner has no home or income what shall I do?

ChildSupportLaws Editor 02/12/2016 at 2:24 pm

It is still very early days and your child is still very young, and it sounds as though your partner is being over-protective, which can happen in the first few months. If you have parental responsibility, then you have as much right as your partner to take your child to see your parents and/or make decisions regarding your child. However, much depends on whether this could make your current situation worse. You don't give the reasons why your partner is refusing to let your parents see your child, but if you can sit down and talk to her about the matter rationally, then this may help. Hopefully, it will blow over in time, as it really is something you would have to try and negotiate between yourselves.

Jord 02/12/2016 at 8:57 am

Hi me and my partner are still together, things are bad atm because she won't let me take my son to my parents house to see them which hurts me a lot, do I have any rights that would allow me to do so without her permission. My parents haven't done anything wrong all they want is the best for me and my little family and want to help us in anyway shape or form. My mum especially is madly in love with my son (15 weeks old) and adores him but my fiancé has stopped them both from seeing him for a month exactly now, please help

ChildSupportLaws Editor 01/12/2016 at 12:31 pm

We cannot predict what a court may decide, I can only suggest you take some legal advice in order to explore your options. Much always depends upon how hard your ex is willing to fight in order to prevent you having access. However, the courts are also aware that many resident-parents have no grounds to prevent access and will do its best to ensure you as the father has a fair amount of access to your child.

Tommy 01/12/2016 at 11:26 am

Hi me and my partner (not married) split 12 weeks after the birth of our daughter (her second child) she is saying I can only see her twice through the week to hers for a couple of hours and I can only take her to my house once a week for a few hours but I can't take her anywhere she is also saying she won't ever spend a Christmas with me it will always be with her and her son she keeps moving the goal post as at first she said I can see her everyday which I want to i will pay what ever I need to towards he but I feel she needs to spend as much time with her dad as she does her mum if I went to court would I get minimum 3 days a week with my daughter also would I get to alternate having her at Christmas

Flainey 18/11/2016 at 6:43 pm

My partner and I separated 4 years ago we have daughter who is six. She has been going to his every other weekend until three weeks ago when my shift pattern was becoming impossible and I asked if she could go to his every weekend. Essentially I organise care for 5 days and he 2.
He is telling me he is not happy with this....but me and my daughter are both much less stressed, so I am unhappy at the thought changing back . Is there anything I can do to make him share the care of our daughter in this 2 to 5 split so me and her have a better balance.
He is named on her birth certificate.
Thankyou.

ChildSupportLaws Editor 10/11/2016 at 12:12 pm

I can only direct you to the child maintenance calculator so your partner can assess how much he should be paying, based upon the number of nights he has the children overnight, Much also depends upon the amount of nights your partner's ex states he has the children overnight. However, if your partner can prove he has the children to the frequency he does (and his ex is denying this) then the CMS have to take this into consideration.

Sue 09/11/2016 at 5:27 pm

My partners daughter stays at his mother's house over night. 3-4 times a week as the childs mother works nights. Would this affect my partner on how much he has to pay child maintenance as we think £300 is alot to pay as it is shared care. We have explained this situation over the phone and haven't got anywhere.

niya 25/10/2016 at 3:13 pm

my boyfriend and i got separated but we have a son, together with my son, we leave his place without his permission because of some problems. my son and I living our lives without his presence, without his support. but he contacted me to get our son back, .what should i do? he, in the first place didnt support us financially or emotionally.

thali 18/10/2016 at 11:44 pm

Hi. Well i have 2 kids with my partner (we're not married) we live together but things aren't going good between us. He has 1 kid with each two different women. I don't know how he's working out that situation. He says that the fact that he has two kids with different women doesn't matter that he still can take the kids away from me because i don't work or have anyway of maintaining them. He may buy there needs but he doesn't give himself time to spend with them, he rather go out with his "friends". I'm the one who is with my kids 24 hours a day. I care for them when all he does when he's home is grab for like 2 minutes. So i want to know who has the most possibility of keeping my kids or what are the options?

ckin2u1989 14/10/2016 at 8:52 pm

The father of my two children has kept the kids due to the fact I no longer want to be in relationship so he's used kids against me and they are on child protection due to domestic violence towards me and around kids & I haven't seen them for over a month & had to seek legal advice because he has parental rights, so now I've had to fight for my kids through courts which I'm still waiting for court date even though my kids have not been took through the system. I have another child who is with me because the father of my two girls isn't the father to my son who is with me so he has no rights over my son.

ChildSupportLaws Editor 21/09/2016 at 11:04 am

Yes, you would have to take the matter to court to move back to Spain. However, a court will consider what it thinks is in the children's best interests and if you can prove your children would have a better life in Spain, it will be considered. You can check whether you would be eligible for legal aid via which

starlativia 20/09/2016 at 10:38 am

Hi, I'm not married, my partner has patental responsibilities over our two children. He is Italian and I'm Spanish. Here in UK we are in hardship, living over the benefits system. In Spain I own a house and I can find a job. He does not agree on me taking the children to Spain. Can a court see as a benefit for the children to take them back to your country of origin if in UK they have to rely on the benefits system and rent accomodation? Also does legal aid cover the cost of this? Thanks

ChildSupportLaws Editor 15/09/2016 at 2:09 pm

You would have to seek legal advice regarding this as if you separate and you are on a dependent visa then you would have to either apply for a new visa or return home, If your husband does not give his consent to return home with your daughter, you would have to request permission through the courts. The court will then decide what it thinks is in your daughter's best interests. It is difficult to speculate what your position would be, or what a court may decide, that's why speaking to a legal professional will help you further

Anonymous 15/09/2016 at 12:14 am

I am married to my husband and have a daughter who is 1 year and 4months old.
My marriage is at a stage where we abuse each other and he has hit me twice now. In short I can't live with him anymore. Problem is I am on a dependant visa. My husband and daughter are British and I am on extensions till another 5 years. I do not want to leave the country and want full custody of my daughter. I have been tthreatened so many times on sending be back to my home country and never show me my daughter's face. I can't stand him but my daughter is all I have and want.
How will this work .. do you have a solution for it pls.

ChildSupportLaws Editor 06/07/2016 at 12:57 pm

You can calculate your holiday entitlement which

Murphy 05/07/2016 at 5:27 pm

I need to know what holidays I'm untitled to and how many days i can have each year for summers. I have a 5yr old and 3yr old, I just had a court order finalised a few months ago. But holidays weren't included as in summer ones, Someone had said that 2016 I'd get 2 long wkends then 2017 I'd get a full week and a long wkend then 2018 I'd get 2 full weeks cand anyone confirm that. Thank you

ChildSupportLaws Editor 15/06/2016 at 11:08 am

If the father of your child is registered on the birth certificate and has parental responsibility, then if both parents have PR and one parent is keeping the children against the other's wishes, the police CANNOT help, even if the children do not normally live with them. However, if the parent does not have PR, the police will be able to intervene. If you are concerned about this happening then you can apply for Child Arrangement Order, which is an order which determines where your child lives. If you can show that your former partner is not able or appropriate to look after your child, you may be able to get an order stating that the children should live with you. However you will need to evidence this.If you are worried that your ex may take the child without your consent you can also apply for a Prohibited Steps Order through the courts. A PSO is an order granted by the court in family cases which prevents either parent from carrying out certain events or making specific trips with their children without the express permission of the other parent. This is more common in cases where there is suspicion that one parent may leave the area with their children. We have all heard the stories of a parent taking their child for the weekend and not returning them or going abroad with them and it becoming extremely difficult for the other parent to get their child back. Thankfully, this is one of the scenarios that a PSO seeks to prevent. If your ex is threatening to take your child, then you should seek legal advice to explore your best options.

Jacy 14/06/2016 at 12:44 pm

My partner and i split up we are not married, I want to keep my daughter to live with me she is 19 months old but he is making my life very hard. What does the law says ? Can he take her from me? What is the best thing to do in this case?
Thank you

ChildSupportLaws Editor 18/05/2016 at 10:24 am

If you have parental responsibility the caring of your child should be a shared matter, if you agree this between yourselves. There are no legal rules to say who should take time off, but in an ideal world it should be shared fairly and equally between both parents.

Gily 17/05/2016 at 11:10 am

Me and partner has spilt up and she moved away only 20 min up road but when child is sick who is Responsible To take the time of work to look after the child please

ChildSupportLaws Editor 09/05/2016 at 1:50 pm

You cannot take the children out of the country without your husbands consent, if you do so it can be classed as abduction. I suggest you seek professional legal/immigration advice to see what your rights are regarding remaining in the country if you divorce.

ChildSupportLaws Editor 06/05/2016 at 2:25 pm

You can return to your home country with your children only if you can obtain your husband's consent. If he does not agree to this then you would have to take the matter to court in order for the court to decide. If you decide to take your children without your husband's consent, then you face being charged with abduction.

Zyna 06/05/2016 at 10:23 am

I'm married and living under my in laws with my husband and 2 babies. I'm under a spouse visa and my marriage isn't going very well for quite some time now. I'm not sure what my rights are as a mother to my children and a wife to my husband? And is it possible to take my children back to my country even if they are British citizens? How will it work? Help please. Thanks

Zyna 06/05/2016 at 10:18 am

I'm married and currently living in London with 2 babies with my husband under his parents house. I'm under a spouse visa and I'd like to know what are my rights as a mother to my children and a wife to my husband and the father of my kids? My marriage is not going very well for quite sometime now and I don't know if I can cope anymore. If I decide to go back to my country is it possible to take my children with me?

Zyna 06/05/2016 at 9:59 am

I'm living with my husband and 2 kids with the parents of my husbands house. I'm under a spouse visa and my children are UK citizens. Marriage is not going very well and I don't think I can cope anymore. I'd like to know my rights as a mother to my children if we separate? And can I take my children to my country if possible?

ChildSupportLaws Editor 22/04/2016 at 11:55 am

Unless the court has specified that your new partner cannot meet the children, or your ex is the primary carer of your children and your children do not live with you, then the decision is up to you. If your children do not live with you and your ex refuses to let your new partner meet your children, then you would either have to suggest Mediation as a way of resolving the issue through a third-party, or take the matter to court under a Specific Issue Order. Specific Issue Orders, much like the name suggests, are orders sought from the family court to determine a particular matter in connection with the exercise of Parental Responsibility. These orders can cover a wide range of issues that you and your ex-partner cannot agree on. As in all cases, the court’s main concern is the welfare of the children in question. The court will always put the children’s best interests first and this main issue will determine the outcome of any application for an order. I hope this helps.

issy 21/04/2016 at 3:45 pm

Ive been.split qith.my husband e years now and divorced a year im now in a very liven relationship now with someone who is good to me and lives me for me ive just found out that the father of my kids has to agree to my new panter meeting the kids witch I know.he wont and if he doesnt agree to this what happens next ease help

Jobo 23/03/2016 at 6:24 pm

I have a 2 year old daughter. My ex husband and i agreed he would leave our rented accommodation. He dictated he would see our daughter every other sat 11am - 7pm. He didn't see his daughter for the first 7 weeks and would turn up an our or two late and drop her back early 5 or 6pm. With no notice of this until the day. He left sept 2015 and has not had our daughter over night since. I would like to divorce him. When can I do this? When can I change my name back to maiden name if he won't devorce soon? Can I change our daughters name to my maiden name? Can I take him to court to take more responsibility for his daughter? I would rather not go to court who else can I seek advice from.

Many thanks

Kramer 11/02/2016 at 9:26 pm

i have been divorced for 4years and have two siblings together. The youngest has learning difficulties to which I as the father seeked support from an outside professional for extra tuition for her needs, Only to be told by my ex partner that it's not my right to do so without her consent as she quoted that she is the primary parent. Is this true? I thought I had equal rights to make decisions such as this especially as these sessions would only take place during my contact.

Bluberry 30/12/2015 at 11:37 am

Hello, I live with my partner for over 3 years, we have 18 moths old child, unfortunately the things between us are not going well and I feel like this relationship will be over soon or late. We both are not from the UK and our daughter was born here. Also we don't have marriage. I feel insecure in this case because he is the main income bringer, I DON'T CLAIM ANY BENEFITS so I have no income, I can't get back to work because I look after our daughter. What rights doea my partner have as a father(he is on the birth certificate), can he claim custody for our daughter because he has the money to look after her? My parents live in the UK and they will support me whatever happens. I'm desperate...many thanks in common

Suzie 17/09/2015 at 9:36 pm

Me and my ex split wen our son was 3 month, he agreed he came to my house 3 days a week so see him and spent time with him, as he stays on his mums couch and takes and deals drugs has a bad life style that I don't want my son around, he has no bond with him at all and he is now one, he has changed 3 nappies and gave him one bath in the year, would rather sit and watch TV than play with his son, so because I said he wasn't having him over nite on his own or out my house on his own he's taking me to court, all I want is his to bond with his son and prove he can cope which he's made more than clear he can't he's no patience with him at all and can't settle him, our son dsnt even know him as his dad he's not saw him in 2 month as I am now waiting for the court case, I'm so stressed and worried for my son with his lifestyle and his patience with him , any help or anyone how has went through this would be a great help

Nikky 16/09/2015 at 6:03 pm

Hello, I was put in the family line with "the promise that once I'm pregnant I can pick a day for the marriage" by my kids father and his mother but was denied all right afterwards. His names are Adetunji Johnson Bamidele.
He has always been a traveler and soon after a year of having my son he returned from a trip and I was impregnated with my daughter.
He left the country in year 2000 and later he hooked up with another woman in the UK in 2003. His mother made several attempt to take the children from me so I decided to include my maiden name in their names, making it a compound surname for all, i.e Olaniyi-Bamidele, just incase.
He refuse to be responsible to our kids since 2004 unless I frustrate him to it by several intervention from friends over there.
He came to nigeria in 2009 bringing with him his new wife and 2 out of the 3 kids they have together.
Just last year he began pushing me to delete my name from the kids names, claiming I have no right over them.
I have been responbsible for the 2 children (a boy born 1997 and a girl born 1999 ). He has not lived up to a year in total with these kids in all their lives.
Just this year he told the kids directly that he disowns them if my name still features in their names.
When our son entered university, I told him but he did nothing. Now he is trying to get a hang on him after I paid all necessary fees while he still ingnores the upkeeps.
I called the British Highcommission to look for assistance on this but not much response from them.
I can not handle the maintenance and school fees alone.
My daughter is entering university this year too.
We are in Nigeria and he still reside in the UK with his new family.
PLEASE help my kids.
Sincerely,
Omonike Olaniyi-Bamidele.

libEL36 27/07/2015 at 12:32 pm

My 8yr old son lives with his dad. He has done for 2yrs. His father dictated that our son could come to mine Wednesdays and Thursdays. He's a very manipulative man so any contact at weekends with my son or plans we make this man ruins nearly every time. I've just gone along with it as the arguements really affect my little boy. But now my daughter starts nursery September, and as I can't be in two places at the same time (my son lives half an hour away and attends school there) I've asked to have him Tuesdays and Wednesdays instead. This man has caused uproar about this. Involved our son yet again in the arguement and told me I'll need to take him to court to get anything changed? There is NO legal agreement at all, just him dictating when I can see OUR son. I'm not sure what steps I need to take. Can anyone help please?

juoel 05/05/2015 at 3:09 am

Is it mandatory to do a paternity test before a maintenance order is given ... or only if the father request it first ???

ChildSupportLaws Editor 24/04/2015 at 10:19 am

@vickie - I'm not surprised you're finding it hard. If he is refusing to let you see your child, you need to go through the process listed in the article; When Your Ex-Partner Denies You Access, whichI hope this helps.

vickie 22/04/2015 at 7:01 pm

I'm currently going through a break up we have a one year old child.. I'm working fulltime and I let him have all benifits as he would be having her one more day than me but I've recently got in a new relationship and he's turned around and stopped me from seeing our child full stop! He wants to take me to court I wish he could be civil any advice just to shine some light as I'm finding this very hard at the minute

Feeling sorry for th 13/03/2015 at 12:43 pm

Hi CSL,
I am feeling really sorry for my niece. Her mum is a massive control freak and will not let my brother have any parental control or access to his daughter because she states that I am rude and aggressive.
She once decided to tell people I called her a bad mother ... So when I confronted her and realised she had made it up, she has since stopped my brother from seeing his daughter.
States that out warm & humble home enviornment is too stressful for her daughter to come too. She is using and finding any excuse to not allow him to see or spend time with his daughter. Also... She has since been telling people since I confronted her that I assaulted her!!!! Absolutely shocking. She loves any attention, whether it be of the good or bad kind! It's really wearing us all down!

ChildSupportLaws Editor 14/01/2015 at 2:53 pm

@libby - apart from the information in the article laying out your rights, you don't say what you want help with, which makes it difficult to advise. Do you need guidance regarding access, has he stopped you from seeing them? You need to be more specific and then we can help to try and answer your question.

libby 14/01/2015 at 2:08 pm

I have three children who live with thier father he has residency of them I'm thier mother I have rights to my children regardless what he says. We had a bad relationship and hate each other's guts he do anything to use my kids as weapons please help with regards to my rights

mummyof1 11/10/2014 at 1:52 am

Hi a final court order was placed back in June for my ex to have access to my daughter every other weekend. He has now come to the conclusion he doesn't like it and wants more access. I don't trust him and I feel his tryna control the situation now that court is over. His very demanding and is now threaten me with court again. Am I worrying for nothing? ? Has he still got his full rights to just take her even thou the court order is in place?

srethik 26/06/2014 at 7:20 pm

I am an Indian citizen married to a British Citizen of Indian origin. Our marriage happened in India and registered in India. I have stayed in UK for around 1.5 years on my husband's dependent visa after marriage. Our relationship was never good and there were fights, disagreements mainly over my job and my contribution to house's expenditure. There were even few instances of domestic violence on me. I have never reported this to any authorities. A few months back a baby boy was born and he is a British Citizen. My parents were in UK to help me with my delivery and new born. When they returned, I came to India with my baby. We applied for OCI (Overseas Citizen of India) visa for our baby. This was with my husbands consent and the agreement was to return back in 3 months time. Back in India, I discussed the issues in my marriage with my parents and in-laws. The in-laws didnt take it well and informed my husband. My husband is highly unhappy with me and I am scared and worried to come back. He said I need not be back on his spouse visa but he wants his baby back as the baby is a UK citizen. I do not want to be separated from my 7 months old baby. My husband is threatening me that he will file an abduction case in UK against me. Will it be valid? What are my rights? Please advise.

cellp08 27/09/2012 at 4:54 pm

my husband and i split because he drank and did not provide for me and my children. \i worked and we finally got a council house we never divorced as we were both roman catholics. this was 1972 i did try through dhss to get maintenance but they always said in the DHSS offices that they could not trace him.. When it was four years from my pension age i asked for a pension forecast and was shocked to learn that although i had always paid full insurance stamps my pension was going to be small as i had time off to have my children, and nostamps were paid what they did not tell me ws that my husband died at the time i was enquiring about nmy pension rights i asked them to trace him and every time they said no trace although i knew very weel he must be on their books as he was paying tax and national insurance. finally in 2010 after18 years of phoning writing and never giving up one man at the now dwp spent 40 minutes with me asking questions and informed me my husband was dead and had been since 1992. So when in april 1993 when i was enquiring about him and asking them to check as his contributions should have covered my maternity leave he was already dead for five months my quesition is that although dwp knew this they kept saying they could not trace him why was i not informed and i believe this was because as still being his wife legally and the mother of his children i was entitled to four years widows pension from december 1992 until november 1996 when ireceived my own pension and they did not want to pay me i amstill fighting this so wish me luck

Ask Child Support Laws a question

Ask our editorial team a question and we will reply with our advice. Tell us as much about your situation as you can: the more detail you give, the more useful our answer can be.

You do not need to use your real name. Please do not include your full address, phone number, email address, or the names of other people. We may edit or remove identifying details for privacy and legal reasons.

Comments are moderated before publication.

Child Support Rights Checker Tool The Different Types of Contact Orders

Child Support and the Family Law Act 1996

Child Support and the Children Act 1989

Child Support and the Human Rights Act 1998

Legal Rights for Separating Parents

Seeking Child Support Representation