What counts as domestic violence?
Domestic abuse covers a wide range of behaviour between people who are or have been intimate partners or family members. It includes physical violence, but also emotional abuse, controlling behaviour, financial abuse, sexual abuse, and threats. The abuse does not need to be physical to be taken seriously by the courts.
The legal definition applies regardless of gender or sexuality. It also covers young people aged 16 and 17, recognising that teenagers can be victims of abuse in relationships.
Domestic abuse often involves a pattern of behaviour rather than isolated incidents. Courts and support services look for these patterns when assessing risk. Coercive control, where one person uses tactics to dominate and restrict another, became a specific criminal offence in England and Wales under the Serious Crime Act 2015.
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When parents separate, the family court often considers that children benefit from having a relationship with both parents. However, this is not automatic. The court must consider any risk of harm to the child or the other parent.
If there are allegations of domestic abuse, the court will apply Practice Direction 12J. This sets out how judges should handle cases involving abuse. The court will consider whether the abuse happened, what impact it has had, and what risk it poses going forward.
Contact may still be ordered in cases involving domestic abuse, but with conditions. These might include:
- Supervised contact at a contact centre
- Indirect contact only, such as letters or video calls
- Handovers in public places or through a third party
- Conditions that the abusive parent complete a behaviour change programme
In serious cases, the court may decide that direct contact is not in the child's best interests. Each case is assessed individually, taking specific circumstances into account.
Your situation may be slightly different. ask a question below ↓ and our editorial team will reply with our advice.
Evidence the court may consider
If you are raising domestic abuse in a contact dispute, the court will want to see supporting evidence where possible. This might include police reports, criminal convictions, medical records, text messages, emails, photographs of injuries, or statements from witnesses.
Physical evidence is not always required. The court can consider your account and decide whether it is credible. A fact finding hearing may be held to determine whether the alleged abuse occurred before the court makes decisions about contact.
If you have a non-molestation order or occupation order in place, this will be relevant. The court will also take into account any findings made in previous family proceedings.
Legal aid may be available if you are applying for a protective order or if you can provide evidence of domestic abuse. The evidence requirements include medical reports, letters from domestic violence support services, evidence of a protective injunction, police reports, or confirmation from a multi-agency risk assessment conference. Full details of acceptable evidence are set out on GOV.UK.
Getting help and support
If you are experiencing domestic abuse, or have experienced it in the past, there are organisations that can help.
The National Domestic Abuse Helpline, run by Refuge, offers free and confidential support 24/7 on 0808 2000 247. They can provide advice, safety planning, and help you find refuge accommodation if needed.
Citizens Advice can help you understand your options regarding housing, benefits, and legal matters. Many local areas also have specialist domestic abuse services that can support you through court proceedings.
If you are going to court and are worried about seeing the other parent, you can ask for special measures. These might include separate waiting areas, screens in the courtroom, or giving evidence by video link. You can make this request through the court or ask your solicitor to do so.
For men experiencing domestic abuse, the Men's Advice Line provides support on 0808 8010 327. The Galop helpline supports LGBT people on 0800 999 5428.
If you are in immediate danger, call 999. If you cannot speak safely, stay on the line after dialling and press 55 when prompted. This is part of the Silent Solutions system and lets the operator know you need emergency help.
Family court proceedings involving domestic abuse can be difficult. Getting legal advice early, even if only an initial consultation, can help you understand what to expect and how to present your case. Many solicitors offer a free or fixed fee first appointment.
She where taking holiday without permission from me
actually on 2 October 2020 she did apply for non domestic molesting order due my poor English I was supposed to go to the court to defend myself I did not go because on the paper did say the court is sitting it was not specified I was supposed to attempt
Couple months ago I did apply C100 and the case is on the first November 2021
I heard in this few days she again take the child out UK without permission can she do this? I do not know if still need a permission of me or she can go in holiday without permission
In either case what I can do?
There has been extreme violence between his ex-partner and her boyfriend.
The boyfriend has been arrested and despite his behaviour they are still together.
My son wants to ensure the safety of his daughter and wants to know if he can issue a court order against this man which will protect her from being around him.
I'm trying to find legal information regarding my children witnessing a physical fight between my ex and his new girlfriend. There was smashing up of possessions, kicks and slaps. I am drafting an email to him today but was looking for credible legal based links to highlight how this behaviour must desist or I will take further action. I have, fruitlessly, been trawling the
Do I call the police, I am worried she will make my kids suffer for it.
I’m lost
Trying to prove her lies was impossible and she used the courts and police to get court orders snd stopped me seeing my daughter got 3 yrs.I begged people to see that she was the abuser and they laughed at me.6 yrs later and my daughter aged 10 has been beaten,bruised,lost hair,raped by her mother’s nephew (all kept from me) and social involvement throughout again without my knowledge.My daughter ran away snd when she felt safe told the truth about the years of abuse.My daughter now lives with me full time,is now at the correct weight and excelling at primary school.........Mother has contact when she can be bothered.....
Not all abusers are men......
He then got in contact the month I was due. I allowed him at the birth and I was kept in hospital for a week, where he also stayed to support us. Once I returned home, he would visit as an when he wanted to but over the weeks this became less and less. In a total of 11 weeks he has spent 16.5 hours with his son. I am exclusively breastfeeding and have been since birth and he has asked me to give this up so he can see him without being in my home. I don’t want to do this as breastfeeding has always been something I wanted to do. It has turned very bitter and he stopped visiting because I wouldn’t allow him to take my newborn baby away. I decided to register my son at the very end of the 6 week period as I wanted to base my decision on the effort that my ex partner has put in. He would regularly not turn up to visits, he would always make excuses, saying he was bed bound ill but then be seen out. He missed hospital appointments regarding our sons health despite promising to be there. I chose to give our son my surname. I decided to not put his details on the birth certificate purely down to the fact I don’t trust his intentions / judgement. And certain behaviour had shown he could not be trusted and was irresponsible. During the first two weeks of my son being born I had to call the police on him whilst he was visiting due to him being verbally abusive and then pushing me whilst he had my son in his arms. I have also had to report him to the police for slandering me on social media, writing Incorrect information about me and the situation.
I also have found out he is doing cocaine.
He has not paid or contributed towards his son at all since he has been born, not 1 penny.
Since leaving me, he has no fixed address. He has been staying with a friend, as well as his new girlfriend (the one he cheated on me with).
I have received an email from a mediation company (where josh has told them I’ve refused mediation) that he is taking me to court for 50/50 custody. Our baby is 11 weeks old on Thursday. As stated, I am exclusively breastfeeding. Should I be worried, does anyone know what the outcome is likely to be?
Thank you
He did the job well, my child was removed, and soon enough, as he wants to control my relationship, as i had explicitly implored to the judge he would, he reported suggested mute behaviour, after contact- it has been nearly over a year. Social workers, due to them delaying seeing my child, start to say i cannot have it unsupervised. The dv, was well recorded, and can be presented. Can i take action? For the first time in my childs life, they have had turned a new age, and i have not been able so much as speak to them. I believe psychological dv, is not being acknowledged. Are you able to contact a experienced barrister. Can we see a way parental alienation, attitude to contact be revoked. Through huge working history, of historical risk.
Can i do this as im worried for the girls emotional well being
Despite my violent controlling ex
Failing 4 drug and alcohol tests
Admitting 10 accounts of domestic violience, 2 physical ( there were more) 8 instances of manipulation coercion and control
He is seeing our 2 year old tomorrow under supervision
I have PTSD symptoms. No emotional support
Its ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING.
I applied for a court order in November 2018 so I could get access to my youngest child as the mother would only give me access to my other two children.
She then tock it back to court in March trying to change and cut my contact but the courts didn’t allow this and I gain a extra night with the children.
I have found myself coming under a lot of verbal abuse from herself and her mother constantly and the children are witnessing this as it’s everytime I collect or drop off to her.
I have my children asking to stay with me and does not want to go home. It’s my youngest child that is more happier to go back to her mum as she is the youngest and her mothers favourite child so I can see that my other children are being pushed out.
I can’t afford legal assistant and I had to go to court on my own which I was very nervous about but would do it again for my children.
I have reported to police and social services so many times on her behaviour and the effect that she is having on our children.
Is there anyway that I can take this back to court and how and what can I do about her verbal abuse towards myself and is having a big effect on the children I do not know who to turn to and I don’t know what to do as it feels like am on my own and no one is listening to me.
Any reply’s would be helpful
Many thanks
His dad is on his birth cert which means he has parental rights.
My question is 1 do i have sole custody or do i need to apply for it
And 2 if i want to move countrys with my child can his dad stop me?
I'm currently in a situation where I have recently broken up with my partner (daughters mum) because she was violent to me over the space of 18 months and on 3 occasions she assaulted me while she had hold of my daughter, aswell as controlling to the point were I was made to stop seeing my family and my daughter wasnt allowed near them, and if I contacted them it would lead to me being assaulted, and recently I stood up for myself and rang the police on her because she had held a knife over me because I had taken my daughter to see my mum, police have bailed her on a common assault charge with it being classed as domestic violence, social services aren't much help because it seems like they're on her side because she has mental health issues, I agreed to supervised visits for my ex with my daughter, but social are now saying she has the right to anything she wants, and they're making demands of me all the time and I feel like I'm still being controlled, is there anything I can do because Its my daughters safety and well bein I'm worried about, by being around my exs emotional state, her violence, aswell as her parents being alcoholics, violent and emotionally abusive towards my ex, aswell as them trying to take over how we raised our daughter
I just want some advice on where to go now.
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